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Virtue

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Also: Righteousness

Virtue is a quality of moral goodness or excellence. When we speak of individual virtues, we are talking about qualities that we aspire to. A virtue must be cultivated for it to become a habitual way of living in the world around us.


For each of us, there is a core set of virtues or principles that serves our life mission. When we violate these, we violate ourselves. In addition, there are many other virtues that in turn serve this moral core. However, they are constantly in competition with each other, which creates a complicated sort of balancing act that some call relativism.


In any given situation, we must weigh these virtues against each other by considering how they serve our personal moral core and life mission. For example, sometimes a life mission will be served by cultivating tolerance or patience. Other times it will be better served by exercising judgment and activism. Knowing how to balance the virtues in any one situation requires us to make discerning judgments. The practices of meditation, study, and contemplation can guide us in this endeavor.

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Nobler Instincts Take Time
Media culture should allow time for reflective moments, say USC neuroscientists in a study that also shows higher emotions to be as rooted in the body as primal impulses

Emotions linked to our moral sense awaken slowly in the mind, according to a new study from a neuroscience group led by corresponding author Antonio Damasio, director of the Brain and Creativity Institute at the University of Southern California.

The finding, contained in one of the first brain studies of inspirational emotions in a field dominated by a focus on fear and pain, suggests that digital media culture may be better suited to some mental processes than others.

"For some kinds of thought, especially moral decision-making about other people's social and psychological situations, we need to allow for adequate time and reflection," said first author Mary Helen Immordino-Yang.

Humans can sort information very quickly and can respond in fractions of seconds to signs of physical pain in others.

Admiration and compassion—two of the social emotions that define humanity—take much longer, Damasio's group found.

Their study will appear next week in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences Online Early Edition.

"Damasio's study has extraordinary implications for the human perception of events in a digital communication environment," said media scholar Manuel Castells, holder of the Wallis Annenberg Chair of Communication Technology and Society at USC. "Lasting compassion in relationship to psychological suffering requires a level of persistent, emotional attention."

The study's authors used compelling, real-life stories to induce admiration for virtue or skill, or compassion for physical or social pain, in 13 volunteers (the emotion felt was verified through a careful protocol of pre- and post-imaging interviews).

Brain imaging showed that the volunteers needed six to eight seconds to fully respond to stories of virtue or social pain.

However, once awakened, the responses lasted far longer than the volunteers' reactions to stories focused on physical pain.

The study raises questions about the emotional cost—particularly for the developing brain—of heavy reliance on a rapid stream of news snippets.

"If things are happening too fast, you may not ever fully experience emotions about other people's psychological states and that would have implications for your morality," Immordino- Yang said.

As a former public junior high school teacher who pioneered a doctoral thesis track on learning and the brain at Harvard University, and who holds a joint appointment in the Rossier School of Education along with her assistant professorship in the institute (part of the USC College of Letters, Arts and Sciences), Immordino-Yang stressed the study's relevance to teaching.

"Educators are charged with the role of producing moral citizens who can think in ethical ways, who feel responsible to help others less fortunate, who can use their knowledge to make the world a better place," she said.

"And so we need to understand how social experience shapes interactions between the body and mind, to produce citizens with a strong moral compass."

Clearly, normal life events will always provide opportunities for humans to feel admiration and compassion.

But fast-paced digital media tools may direct some heavy users away from traditional avenues for learning about humanity, such as engagement with literature or face-to-face social interactions.

Immordino-Yang did not blame digital media. "It's not about what tools you have, it's about how you use those tools," she said.

Castells said he was less concerned about online social spaces, some of which can provide opportunities for reflection, than about "fast-moving television or virtual games."

"In a media culture in which violence and suffering becomes an endless show, be it in fiction or in infotainment, indifference to the vision of human suffering gradually sets in," he said.

Damasio agreed: "What I'm more worried about is what is happening in the (abrupt) juxtapositions that you find, for example, in the news.

"When it comes to emotion, because these systems are inherently slow, perhaps all we can say is, not so fast."

The study, titled "Neural Correlates of Admiration and Compassion," takes a positive tack in research on emotion and the brain.

Damasio called the study "the first to investigate the neural bases of admiration and one of the first to deal with compassion in a context broader than physical pain. To say that admiration has been neglected is an understatement."

Many previous studies have focused on negative emotions such as fear. By studying admiration, Damasio's group is focusing on those impulses that bring out the best in humanity.

Admiration, Damasio said, "gives us a yardstick for what to reward in a culture, and for what to look for and try to inspire."

He and Hanna Damasio, co-director of the institute and director of the Dornsife Imaging Center in the USC College, chose the study of admiration as one of the institute's founding projects.

From Presidents Obama and Clinton to foster kids down the block, stories abound of individuals who have transcended their situations because of admiration for a key person in their lives.

"We actually separate the good from the bad in great part thanks to the feeling of admiration," Damasio said. "It's a deep physiological reaction that's very important to define our humanity."

It is also deeply rooted in the brain and the sense of the body, the study found, engaging primal neural systems that regulate blood chemistry, the digestive system and other parts of the body.

Damasio called it evidence, pending replication of this study by other groups, that social emotions have deep evolutionary roots.

"People generally don't think of emotions like admiration and compassion as having forerunners in evolution," he noted.

"We reveal that these emotions engage the basic systems of our physiology."

For Immordino-Yang, who focused on literature as an undergraduate, the study presented an intriguing test of the ancient poetic trope that compares deep emotion to physical injury—a "broken heart" being the obvious example.

"The poets had it right all along," she said. "This isn't merely metaphor. Our study shows that we use the feeling of our own body as a platform for knowing how to respond to other people's social and psychological situations.

"These emotions are visceral, in the most literal sense—they are the biological expression of 'do unto others as you would have them do unto you.' "

Finally, the study showed that physical and social pain engage the posteromedial cortex, a central hub in the brain related to the sense of self and consciousness.

In keeping with that finding, volunteers reported a heightened sense of self-awareness after hearing the stories. Many expressed a desire to lead better lives. Some even refused the customary payment for participation, Immordino-Yang said.

Intriguingly, the posteromedial cortex appears to use different areas for responding to physical or social pain.

"The brain is honoring a distinction between things that have to do with physicality and things that have to do with the mind," Damasio said.

###

The National Institutes on Health, the Mathers Foundation and the institute's endowment funded the study.

The mission of the Brain and Creativity Institute is to study the neurological roots of human emotions, memory and communication and to apply the findings to problems in the biomedical and sociocultural arenas.

The institute brings together technology and the social sciences in a novel interdisciplinary setting. For more information, visit www.usc.edu/schools/college/bci/index.html



Nobler Instincts Take Time

Emotions linked to our moral sense awaken slowly in the mind, according to a new study from a neuroscience group led by corresponding author Antonio Damasio, director of the Brain and Creativity Institute at the University of Southern California.

The finding, contained in one of the first brain studies of inspirational emotions in a field dominated by a focus on fear and pain, suggests that digital media culture may be better suited to some mental processes than others.

"For some kinds of thought, especially moral decision-making about other people's social and psychological situations, we need to allow for adequate time and reflection," said first author Mary Helen Immordino-Yang.

Humans can sort information very quickly and can respond in fractions of seconds to signs of physical pain in others.

Admiration and compassion—two of the social emotions that define humanity—take much longer, Damasio's group found.

Their study will appear next week in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences Online Early Edition.

"Damasio's study has extraordinary implications for the human perception of events in a digital communication environment," said media scholar Manuel Castells, holder of the Wallis Annenberg Chair of Communication Technology and Society at USC. "Lasting compassion in relationship to psychological suffering requires a level of persistent, emotional attention."

The study's authors used compelling, real-life stories to induce admiration for virtue or skill, or compassion for physical or social pain, in 13 volunteers (the emotion felt was verified through a careful protocol of pre- and post-imaging interviews).

Brain imaging showed that the volunteers needed six to eight seconds to fully respond to stories of virtue or social pain.

However, once awakened, the responses lasted far longer than the volunteers' reactions to stories focused on physical pain.

The study raises questions about the emotional cost—particularly for the developing brain—of heavy reliance on a rapid stream of news snippets.

"If things are happening too fast, you may not ever fully experience emotions about other people's psychological states and that would have implications for your morality," Immordino- Yang said.

As a former public junior high school teacher who pioneered a doctoral thesis track on learning and the brain at Harvard University, and who holds a joint appointment in the Rossier School of Education along with her assistant professorship in the institute (part of the USC College of Letters, Arts and Sciences), Immordino-Yang stressed the study's relevance to teaching.

"Educators are charged with the role of producing moral citizens who can think in ethical ways, who feel responsible to help others less fortunate, who can use their knowledge to make the world a better place," she said.

"And so we need to understand how social experience shapes interactions between the body and mind, to produce citizens with a strong moral compass."

Clearly, normal life events will always provide opportunities for humans to feel admiration and compassion.

But fast-paced digital media tools may direct some heavy users away from traditional avenues for learning about humanity, such as engagement with literature or face-to-face social interactions.

Immordino-Yang did not blame digital media. "It's not about what tools you have, it's about how you use those tools," she said.

Castells said he was less concerned about online social spaces, some of which can provide opportunities for reflection, than about "fast-moving television or virtual games."

"In a media culture in which violence and suffering becomes an endless show, be it in fiction or in infotainment, indifference to the vision of human suffering gradually sets in," he said.

Damasio agreed: "What I'm more worried about is what is happening in the (abrupt) juxtapositions that you find, for example, in the news.

"When it comes to emotion, because these systems are inherently slow, perhaps all we can say is, not so fast."

The study, titled "Neural Correlates of Admiration and Compassion," takes a positive tack in research on emotion and the brain.

Damasio called the study "the first to investigate the neural bases of admiration and one of the first to deal with compassion in a context broader than physical pain. To say that admiration has been neglected is an understatement."

Many previous studies have focused on negative emotions such as fear. By studying admiration, Damasio's group is focusing on those impulses that bring out the best in humanity.

Admiration, Damasio said, "gives us a yardstick for what to reward in a culture, and for what to look for and try to inspire."

He and Hanna Damasio, co-director of the institute and director of the Dornsife Imaging Center in the USC College, chose the study of admiration as one of the institute's founding projects.

From Presidents Obama and Clinton to foster kids down the block, stories abound of individuals who have transcended their situations because of admiration for a key person in their lives.

"We actually separate the good from the bad in great part thanks to the feeling of admiration," Damasio said. "It's a deep physiological reaction that's very important to define our humanity."

It is also deeply rooted in the brain and the sense of the body, the study found, engaging primal neural systems that regulate blood chemistry, the digestive system and other parts of the body.

Damasio called it evidence, pending replication of this study by other groups, that social emotions have deep evolutionary roots.

"People generally don't think of emotions like admiration and compassion as having forerunners in evolution," he noted.

"We reveal that these emotions engage the basic systems of our physiology."

For Immordino-Yang, who focused on literature as an undergraduate, the study presented an intriguing test of the ancient poetic trope that compares deep emotion to physical injury—a "broken heart" being the obvious example.

"The poets had it right all along," she said. "This isn't merely metaphor. Our study shows that we use the feeling of our own body as a platform for knowing how to respond to other people's social and psychological situations.

"These emotions are visceral, in the most literal sense—they are the biological expression of 'do unto others as you would have them do unto you.' "

Finally, the study showed that physical and social pain engage the posteromedial cortex, a central hub in the brain related to the sense of self and consciousness.

In keeping with that finding, volunteers reported a heightened sense of self-awareness after hearing the stories. Many expressed a desire to lead better lives. Some even refused the customary payment for participation, Immordino-Yang said.

Intriguingly, the posteromedial cortex appears to use different areas for responding to physical or social pain.

"The brain is honoring a distinction between things that have to do with physicality and things that have to do with the mind," Damasio said.

###

The National Institutes on Health, the Mathers Foundation and the institute's endowment funded the study.

The mission of the Brain and Creativity Institute is to study the neurological roots of human emotions, memory and communication and to apply the findings to problems in the biomedical and sociocultural arenas.

The institute brings together technology and the social sciences in a novel interdisciplinary setting. For more information, visit www.usc.edu/schools/college/bci/index.html



University of Southern California - Press Release, April 13, 2009
http://www.usc.edu/schools/college/bci/index.html
Contribution #3216

Source (click to close)

University of Southern California - Press Release, April 13, 2009
http://www.usc.edu/schools/college/bci/index.html
Contribution #3216


A New Science of Virtues
This is a request for research proposals from the University of Chicago.  I am posting it here because it raises fascinating and wonderful questions about what virtue means and how it functions, questions that take into consideration both our biology and our history. 

We hope that this RFP will encourage the most creative new scholarship on virtues. Thus, we do not specify too rigidly in advance exactly which questions and topics may ultimately be pursued. However, it is nonetheless important that the enterprise is well-grounded and sensitive to a wide range of research questions and findings that are currently being discussed. Below, we propose seven broad overlapping themes as a framework for possible areas of inquiry. These may be seen as subthemes of this RFP’s central question: In what ways might the humanities and the sciences cooperate to develop richer understandings of virtue for modern societies.

1. Virtue and the Sciences: What do the insights into humans, that are emerging from the best scientific research, tell us about the nature of virtue? What contribution does science make to our appreciation and understanding of virtue? For example, what might neuroscience and psychology tell us about the difference between reckless risk-taking and, by contrast, moral courage? How can the human sciences and philosophy take account of the findings from scientific knowledge? In what ways do historical and philosophical notions of virtue influence scientific inquiry? Can we find innovative ways to model the impact of the virtues on individuals and societies?

2. Virtue and Evolutionary Biology/Genetics: Are there innate “learning modules” that incline growing children to be sensitive to cultural and religious codes dealing with more conservative-sounding virtues such as loyalty, respect for authority, and purity-sanctity? Have humans evolved with certain virtues or are they strictly cultural constructs? If there is an evolutionary basis for virtue, how does it function to protect or preserve the species? Are there identifiable virtues that are strictly cultural or that, by contrast, have clear biological bases?

3. Virtue and Society: In what ways do social contexts (political, economic, anthropological, legal, ecological) bear on, limit, or support the virtues? Why does virtue remain vital, necessary, and important to human society? What happens when societies abandon the virtues? What happens when societies distort and demean the virtues? What is the role of virtue in a democracy? How does science and scholarship on virtue inform social programs and public policies that touch on virtue? How do we think about virtues in political theory in view of the differentiated spheres of life in modern societies? How do we prevent distortion and misuse of the virtues?

4. Virtue and Human Development: What are the models of virtue that have been thought of in human history that could be revived, refined, and recontextualized for today? What new models might come from this effort? How do such models open up a variety of definitional issues? How do they relate to a variety of other concepts such as habits, character, morality in general, principle, and the intuitive aspects of life? What roles do exemplars play in instantiating virtues? How are virtues inculcated? What role does biology play in the formation of virtue? Brain processes? Psycho-sexual development? Spirituality and religious formation? Schooling? The family? The wider civil society?

5. Virtue and Modernity: How do we think about virtue in light of modernity and the relative autonomy of different spheres of life? Do cross-cultural studies of virtue reveal measurable differentiation from societies that invented the classic models of virtue in the past? How do history, anthropology and sociology work together to show that spheres of life are divided in ways that were utterly foreign to the contexts in which the virtues were first adumbrated and elaborated? In this context, is it best to think in the singular—a science of virtue—or, perhaps, in the plural, a science of the virtues? Does this research open up new ways of thinking about virtue or better enable us to analyze our own context? Are virtues contextually and temporally bound?

6. Philosophical and Theological Conceptions of Virtue: To what extent do virtues stand alone as moral entities or to what extent do they gain their fuller meaning in the context of the larger moral systems within which they are located? How do virtues relate to the larger narratives that shape a religious or cultural tradition? How do they relate to moral principles, e.g., the Golden Rule, the categorical imperative, various utilitarian principles, etc., if at all? Does a theory of virtue or virtues require a theory of goods in the premoral sense and if so, from what source (tradition, science, both) do we learn about what goods are worth pursuing? Can scientific research methods be useful in clarifying ancient debates on particular moral systems?

7. Specific Virtues: One potentially fruitful strategy for bringing many of these questions together might be to concretely examine one important virtue from a variety of angles. Candidates for comprehensive consideration might include courage, humility, purpose, honesty, altruism, duty, responsibility, thrift, tenacity, self-reliance, generosity, loyalty, or integrity. What is fundamental or foundational to human beings and to a decent human society about this virtue? How is this virtue inculcated? Who are the vital, living exemplars of this virtue? What are the social, psychological and biological impacts of this virtue? Why are such models or exemplars important? How is the virtue exemplified in the lives of individuals and in the lives of collectivities?

Again, these themes are meant to be illustrative and many lines of inquiry may prove valuable and lead to important insights. We also welcome proposals from other areas. Indeed, we would recommend that researchers keep in mind basic questions such as:
How are the virtues understood?
Why is virtue important?
Is a science of virtue a useful construct? Why or why not?
How do we know a virtue when we see one?

We encourage projects that demonstrate appropriate and reasonable degrees of attention to both sides of the understanding of science articulated above. Obviously, some proposals will emphasize one aspect more than the other, but all proposals should in some way attempt to bridge the space between the humanities and the natural sciences on the subject of virtue.

If you have any questions, we encourage you to contact:

Brenda Huskey,
Associate Director, Interdisciplinary Programs
The University of Chicago Arete Initiative
5848 South University Avenue Chicago IL 60637
Email: virtues@uchicago.edu


A New Science of Virtues

We hope that this RFP will encourage the most creative new scholarship on virtues. Thus, we do not specify too rigidly in advance exactly which questions and topics may ultimately be pursued. However, it is nonetheless important that the enterprise is well-grounded and sensitive to a wide range of research questions and findings that are currently being discussed. Below, we propose seven broad overlapping themes as a framework for possible areas of inquiry. These may be seen as subthemes of this RFP’s central question: In what ways might the humanities and the sciences cooperate to develop richer understandings of virtue for modern societies.

1. Virtue and the Sciences: What do the insights into humans, that are emerging from the best scientific research, tell us about the nature of virtue? What contribution does science make to our appreciation and understanding of virtue? For example, what might neuroscience and psychology tell us about the difference between reckless risk-taking and, by contrast, moral courage? How can the human sciences and philosophy take account of the findings from scientific knowledge? In what ways do historical and philosophical notions of virtue influence scientific inquiry? Can we find innovative ways to model the impact of the virtues on individuals and societies?

2. Virtue and Evolutionary Biology/Genetics: Are there innate “learning modules” that incline growing children to be sensitive to cultural and religious codes dealing with more conservative-sounding virtues such as loyalty, respect for authority, and purity-sanctity? Have humans evolved with certain virtues or are they strictly cultural constructs? If there is an evolutionary basis for virtue, how does it function to protect or preserve the species? Are there identifiable virtues that are strictly cultural or that, by contrast, have clear biological bases?

3. Virtue and Society: In what ways do social contexts (political, economic, anthropological, legal, ecological) bear on, limit, or support the virtues? Why does virtue remain vital, necessary, and important to human society? What happens when societies abandon the virtues? What happens when societies distort and demean the virtues? What is the role of virtue in a democracy? How does science and scholarship on virtue inform social programs and public policies that touch on virtue? How do we think about virtues in political theory in view of the differentiated spheres of life in modern societies? How do we prevent distortion and misuse of the virtues?

4. Virtue and Human Development: What are the models of virtue that have been thought of in human history that could be revived, refined, and recontextualized for today? What new models might come from this effort? How do such models open up a variety of definitional issues? How do they relate to a variety of other concepts such as habits, character, morality in general, principle, and the intuitive aspects of life? What roles do exemplars play in instantiating virtues? How are virtues inculcated? What role does biology play in the formation of virtue? Brain processes? Psycho-sexual development? Spirituality and religious formation? Schooling? The family? The wider civil society?

5. Virtue and Modernity: How do we think about virtue in light of modernity and the relative autonomy of different spheres of life? Do cross-cultural studies of virtue reveal measurable differentiation from societies that invented the classic models of virtue in the past? How do history, anthropology and sociology work together to show that spheres of life are divided in ways that were utterly foreign to the contexts in which the virtues were first adumbrated and elaborated? In this context, is it best to think in the singular—a science of virtue—or, perhaps, in the plural, a science of the virtues? Does this research open up new ways of thinking about virtue or better enable us to analyze our own context? Are virtues contextually and temporally bound?

6. Philosophical and Theological Conceptions of Virtue: To what extent do virtues stand alone as moral entities or to what extent do they gain their fuller meaning in the context of the larger moral systems within which they are located? How do virtues relate to the larger narratives that shape a religious or cultural tradition? How do they relate to moral principles, e.g., the Golden Rule, the categorical imperative, various utilitarian principles, etc., if at all? Does a theory of virtue or virtues require a theory of goods in the premoral sense and if so, from what source (tradition, science, both) do we learn about what goods are worth pursuing? Can scientific research methods be useful in clarifying ancient debates on particular moral systems?

7. Specific Virtues: One potentially fruitful strategy for bringing many of these questions together might be to concretely examine one important virtue from a variety of angles. Candidates for comprehensive consideration might include courage, humility, purpose, honesty, altruism, duty, responsibility, thrift, tenacity, self-reliance, generosity, loyalty, or integrity. What is fundamental or foundational to human beings and to a decent human society about this virtue? How is this virtue inculcated? Who are the vital, living exemplars of this virtue? What are the social, psychological and biological impacts of this virtue? Why are such models or exemplars important? How is the virtue exemplified in the lives of individuals and in the lives of collectivities?

Again, these themes are meant to be illustrative and many lines of inquiry may prove valuable and lead to important insights. We also welcome proposals from other areas. Indeed, we would recommend that researchers keep in mind basic questions such as:
How are the virtues understood?
Why is virtue important?
Is a science of virtue a useful construct? Why or why not?
How do we know a virtue when we see one?

We encourage projects that demonstrate appropriate and reasonable degrees of attention to both sides of the understanding of science articulated above. Obviously, some proposals will emphasize one aspect more than the other, but all proposals should in some way attempt to bridge the space between the humanities and the natural sciences on the subject of virtue.

If you have any questions, we encourage you to contact:

Brenda Huskey,
Associate Director, Interdisciplinary Programs
The University of Chicago Arete Initiative
5848 South University Avenue Chicago IL 60637
Email: virtues@uchicago.edu


Source type: Website
University of Chicago - Arete Initiative
http://scienceofvirtues.org/arete/Topics.aspx
Viewed on February 21, 2009
Contribution #3108

Source (click to close)

Source type: Website
University of Chicago - Arete Initiative
http://scienceofvirtues.org/arete/Topics.aspx
Viewed on February 21, 2009
Contribution #3108


Raising Moral Kids: Wisdom Commons-A Sprout from Seeds of Compassion

As parents, we want our children to be happy. We want them to achieve great things. But we also want them to be good people. We want to be as proud of their kindness, generosity and integrity as we are of their achievements. How do we help them get there?

Moral development

Research shows us that healthy human children come into the world primed to become moral members of society, just like they come into the world primed to acquire language. Moral emotions, such as empathy, shame and guilt, begin to show their presence during the toddler years. A toddler may pat an injured peer, or offer a grubby toy to an adult who is distressed. A preschooler may hide in the closet to cover a transgression. As a child learns to think, moral emotions are joined by moral reasoning. By age 5 or 6, they can argue long and loud about fairness.

Even so, kids don’t learn to be decent human beings without adult input any more than they learn to communicate without adult input. For a child to grow into an honest adult, for example, we have to model honesty, expect it and explicitly teach it.

Virtue and morality

One way to think about moral development is that bad behavior is simply the absence of virtue. When a child hurts another, it may be that their internal sense of kindness, patience or self-control has fallen short. When they sneak or steal, it means their internal sense of honesty wasn’t as strong as the external temptation.

Rather than making the bad behavior itself the focus of our attention and conversations with them, we can put our energy toward helping them to grow good qualities. This is not to say that bad behavior never needs labels and consequences. Rather, every time our child “crashes” is an opportunity to explain and encourage the virtues we are trying to cultivate.

The Wisdom Commons

The Wisdom Commons, an interactive Web project that sprouted out of Seeds of Compassion, offers parents and educators a new tool for teaching about positive character traits. The Wisdom Commons is structured around a set of approximately 100 virtues that human beings generally agree are important, such as generosity, compassion and courage. As a way of promoting these virtues (and showcasing how widely they are valued), the Web site houses a library of more than 3,000 quotes, stories and other bits of wisdom from around the world.

Once registered on the site, you can click your favorite bits of wisdom to collect them in a “Personal Wisdom Page.” Soon you’ll be able to turn your collection into Mom’s or Dad’s Book of Common Wisdom, a print-on-demand book in which you can mix your collection with photos and a personal dedication. One easy way to find bits of wisdom that are meaningful to you is to sign up for the “Daily Wisbit” sent out to members who request it.

Ideas for parents

  • Choose a “virtue of the week” to discuss at the dinner table. Why does this virtue matter? How is it honored in your family’s spiritual or cultural tradition? How have family members demonstrated this virtue recently? When have they seen it in other people?
  • Ask each child to find a quote that they really like. Have them read it to other family members and explain why they like it.
  • Make a game of reading bits of wisdom aloud together and giving each one a rating, thus prompting whatever discussion is needed to reach a family agreement or average.
  • Find a special quote each week that reflects your family’s values. Click the printer icon after the quote to print it out as an 8½ x 11 poster. Put it on the fridge.
  • Create a Wisdom Page and begin storing bits of wisdom you want to share with your kids. Alternately, create a shared family Wisdom Page together, with input from everyone.

When our kids start leading us

After watching me work on the Wisdom Commons with a team of software engineers and the wonderful volunteers who contributed the first 1,000 bits of wisdom to the site, my middle-school-age daughters, Brynn and Marley, gave me a birthday present. Each of them adopted a virtue (justice and aspiration, respectively). They registered to create wisdom pages of their own and spent a morning researching their chosen virtues and entering quotes and poems they liked.

Then they went back to their other interests, or so I thought. Imagine my surprise and delight last month when I clicked on my “Daily Wisbit” email from the Commons and found a poem about confidence, secretly penned by Brynn.

Our children not only learn from us about what it means to be good, loving, effective people, they also teach us — if we are willing to be taught. But it’s up to us to open the conversation.


Valerie Tarico, Ph.D., is a psychologist and author in Seattle, and founder of WisdomCommons.org. She is also the mother of two middle-school-age girls.

Raising Moral Kids: Wisdom Commons-A Sprout from Seeds of Compassion

As parents, we want our children to be happy. We want them to achieve great things. But we also want them to be good people. We want to be as proud of their kindness, generosity and integrity as we are of their achievements. How do we help them get there?

Moral development

Research shows us that healthy human children come into the world primed to become moral members of society, just like they come into the world primed to acquire language. Moral emotions, such as empathy, shame and guilt, begin to show their presence during the toddler years. A toddler may pat an injured peer, or offer a grubby toy to an adult who is distressed. A preschooler may hide in the closet to cover a transgression. As a child learns to think, moral emotions are joined by moral reasoning. By age 5 or 6, they can argue long and loud about fairness.

Even so, kids don’t learn to be decent human beings without adult input any more than they learn to communicate without adult input. For a child to grow into an honest adult, for example, we have to model honesty, expect it and explicitly teach it.

Virtue and morality

One way to think about moral development is that bad behavior is simply the absence of virtue. When a child hurts another, it may be that their internal sense of kindness, patience or self-control has fallen short. When they sneak or steal, it means their internal sense of honesty wasn’t as strong as the external temptation.

Rather than making the bad behavior itself the focus of our attention and conversations with them, we can put our energy toward helping them to grow good qualities. This is not to say that bad behavior never needs labels and consequences. Rather, every time our child “crashes” is an opportunity to explain and encourage the virtues we are trying to cultivate.

The Wisdom Commons

The Wisdom Commons, an interactive Web project that sprouted out of Seeds of Compassion, offers parents and educators a new tool for teaching about positive character traits. The Wisdom Commons is structured around a set of approximately 100 virtues that human beings generally agree are important, such as generosity, compassion and courage. As a way of promoting these virtues (and showcasing how widely they are valued), the Web site houses a library of more than 3,000 quotes, stories and other bits of wisdom from around the world.

Once registered on the site, you can click your favorite bits of wisdom to collect them in a “Personal Wisdom Page.” Soon you’ll be able to turn your collection into Mom’s or Dad’s Book of Common Wisdom, a print-on-demand book in which you can mix your collection with photos and a personal dedication. One easy way to find bits of wisdom that are meaningful to you is to sign up for the “Daily Wisbit” sent out to members who request it.

Ideas for parents

  • Choose a “virtue of the week” to discuss at the dinner table. Why does this virtue matter? How is it honored in your family’s spiritual or cultural tradition? How have family members demonstrated this virtue recently? When have they seen it in other people?
  • Ask each child to find a quote that they really like. Have them read it to other family members and explain why they like it.
  • Make a game of reading bits of wisdom aloud together and giving each one a rating, thus prompting whatever discussion is needed to reach a family agreement or average.
  • Find a special quote each week that reflects your family’s values. Click the printer icon after the quote to print it out as an 8½ x 11 poster. Put it on the fridge.
  • Create a Wisdom Page and begin storing bits of wisdom you want to share with your kids. Alternately, create a shared family Wisdom Page together, with input from everyone.

When our kids start leading us

After watching me work on the Wisdom Commons with a team of software engineers and the wonderful volunteers who contributed the first 1,000 bits of wisdom to the site, my middle-school-age daughters, Brynn and Marley, gave me a birthday present. Each of them adopted a virtue (justice and aspiration, respectively). They registered to create wisdom pages of their own and spent a morning researching their chosen virtues and entering quotes and poems they liked.

Then they went back to their other interests, or so I thought. Imagine my surprise and delight last month when I clicked on my “Daily Wisbit” email from the Commons and found a poem about confidence, secretly penned by Brynn.

Our children not only learn from us about what it means to be good, loving, effective people, they also teach us — if we are willing to be taught. But it’s up to us to open the conversation.


Valerie Tarico, Ph.D., is a psychologist and author in Seattle, and founder of WisdomCommons.org. She is also the mother of two middle-school-age girls.

Source type: Website
Valerie Tarico
"Parent Map - Giving Back - January 1, 2009"
http://www.parentmap.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1164&Itemid=1
Viewed on February 13, 2009
Contribution #3087

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Source type: Website
Valerie Tarico
"Parent Map - Giving Back - January 1, 2009"
http://www.parentmap.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1164&Itemid=1
Viewed on February 13, 2009
Contribution #3087


The Moral Instinct
 . . . The idea that the moral sense is an innate part of human nature is not far-fetched. A list of human universals collected by the anthropologist Donald E. Brown includes many moral concepts and emotions, including a distinction between right and wrong; empathy; fairness; admiration of generosity; rights and obligations; . . . . Far from debunking morality, then, the science of the moral sense can advance it, by allowing us . . .  to focus on goals we can share and defend.
Which of the following people would you say is the most admirable: Mother Teresa, Bill Gates or Norman Borlaug? And which do you think is the least admirable? For most people, it's an easy question. Mother Teresa, famous for ministering to the poor in Calcutta, has been beatified by the Vatican, awarded the Nobel Peace Prize and ranked in an American poll as the most admired person of the 20th century. Bill Gates, infamous for giving us the Microsoft dancing paper clip and the blue screen of death, has been decapitated in effigy in "I Hate Gates" Web sites and hit with a pie in the face. As for Norman Borlaug . . . who the heck is Norman Borlaug?

Yet a deeper look might lead you to rethink your answers. Borlaug, father of the "Green Revolution" that used agricultural science to reduce world hunger, has been credited with saving a billion lives, more than anyone else in history. Gates, in deciding what to do with his fortune, crunched the numbers and determined that he could alleviate the most misery by fighting everyday scourges in the developing world like malaria, diarrhea and parasites. Mother Teresa, for her part, extolled the virtue of suffering and ran her well-financed missions accordingly: their sick patrons were offered plenty of prayer but harsh conditions, few analgesics and dangerously primitive medical care.

It's not hard to see why the moral reputations of this trio should be so out of line with the good they have done. Mother Teresa was the very embodiment of saintliness: white-clad, sad-eyed, ascetic and often photographed with the wretched of the earth. Gates is a nerd's nerd and the world's richest man, as likely to enter heaven as the proverbial camel squeezing through the needle's eye. And Borlaug, now 93, is an agronomist who has spent his life in labs and nonprofits, seldom walking onto the media stage, and hence into our consciousness, at all.

I doubt these examples will persuade anyone to favor Bill Gates over Mother Teresa for sainthood. But they show that our heads can be turned by an aura of sanctity, distracting us from a more objective reckoning of the actions that make people suffer or flourish. It seems we may all be vulnerable to moral illusions the ethical equivalent of the bending lines that trick the eye on cereal boxes and in psychology textbooks. Illusions are a favorite tool of perception scientists for exposing the workings of the five senses, and of philosophers for shaking people out of the naive belief that our minds give us a transparent window onto the world (since if our eyes can be fooled by an illusion, why should we trust them at other times?). Today, a new field is using illusions to unmask a sixth sense, the moral sense. Moral intuitions are being drawn out of people in the lab, on Web sites and in brain scanners, and are being explained with tools from game theory, neuroscience and evolutionary biology.

"Two things fill the mind with ever new and increasing admiration and awe, the oftener and more steadily we reflect on them," wrote Immanuel Kant, "the starry heavens above and the moral law within." These days, the moral law within is being viewed with increasing awe, if not always admiration. The human moral sense turns out to be an organ of considerable complexity, with quirks that reflect its evolutionary history and its neurobiological foundations.

These quirks are bound to have implications for the human predicament. Morality is not just any old topic in psychology but close to our conception of the meaning of life. Moral goodness is what gives each of us the sense that we are worthy human beings. We seek it in our friends and mates, nurture it in our children, advance it in our politics and justify it with our religions. A disrespect for morality is blamed for everyday sins and history's worst atrocities. To carry this weight, the concept of morality would have to be bigger than any of us and outside all of us.

So dissecting moral intuitions is no small matter. If morality is a mere trick of the brain, some may fear, our very grounds for being moral could be eroded. Yet as we shall see, the science of the moral sense can instead be seen as a way to strengthen those grounds, by clarifying what morality is and how it should steer our actions.

The Moralization Switch

The starting point for appreciating that there is a distinctive part of our psychology for morality is seeing how moral judgments differ from other kinds of opinions we have on how people ought to behave. Moralization is a psychological state that can be turned on and off like a switch, and when it is on, a distinctive mind-set commandeers our thinking. This is the mind-set that makes us deem actions immoral (“killing is wrong”), rather than merely disagreeable (“I hate brussels sprouts”), unfashionable (“bell-bottoms are out”) or imprudent (“don’t scratch mosquito bites”).
 

The first hallmark of moralization is that the rules it invokes are felt to be universal. Prohibitions of rape and murder, for example, are felt not to be matters of local custom but to be universally and objectively warranted. One can easily say, “I don’t like brussels sprouts, but I don’t care if you eat them,” but no one would say, “I don’t like killing, but I don’t care if you murder someone.”

The other hallmark is that people feel that those who commit immoral acts deserve to be punished. Not only is it allowable to inflict pain on a person who has broken a moral rule; it is wrong not to, to “let them get away with it.” People are thus untroubled in inviting divine retribution or the power of the state to harm other people they deem immoral. Bertrand Russell wrote, “The infliction of cruelty with a good conscience is a delight to moralists — that is why they invented hell.”


We all know what it feels like when the moralization switch flips inside us — the righteous glow, the burning dudgeon, the drive to recruit others to the cause. The psychologist Paul Rozin has studied the toggle switch by comparing two kinds of people who engage in the same behavior but with different switch settings. Health vegetarians avoid meat for practical reasons, like lowering cholesterol and avoiding toxins. Moral vegetarians avoid meat for ethical reasons: to avoid complicity in the suffering of animals. By investigating their feelings about meat-eating, Rozin showed that the moral motive sets off a cascade of opinions. Moral vegetarians are more likely to treat meat as a contaminant — they refuse, for example, to eat a bowl of soup into which a drop of beef broth has fallen. They are more likely to think that other people ought to be vegetarians, and are more likely to imbue their dietary habits with other virtues, like believing that meat avoidance makes people less aggressive and bestial.


Much of our recent social history, including the culture wars between liberals and conservatives, consists of the moralization or amoralization of particular kinds of behavior. Even when people agree that an outcome is desirable, they may disagree on whether it should be treated as a matter of preference and prudence or as a matter of sin and virtue. Rozin notes, for example, that smoking has lately been moralized. Until recently, it was understood that some people didn’t enjoy smoking or avoided it because it was hazardous to their health. But with the discovery of the harmful effects of secondhand smoke, smoking is now treated as immoral. Smokers are ostracized; images of people smoking are censored; and entities touched by smoke are felt to be contaminated (so hotels have not only nonsmoking rooms but nonsmoking floors). The desire for retribution has been visited on tobacco companies, who have been slapped with staggering “punitive damages.”


At the same time, many behaviors have been amoralized, switched from moral failings to lifestyle choices. They include divorce, illegitimacy, being a working mother, marijuana use and homosexuality. Many afflictions have been reassigned from payback for bad choices to unlucky misfortunes. There used to be people called “bums” and “tramps”; today they are “homeless.” Drug addiction is a “disease”; syphilis was rebranded from the price of wanton behavior to a “sexually transmitted disease” and more recently a “sexually transmitted infection.”


This wave of amoralization has led the cultural right to lament that morality itself is under assault, as we see in the group that anointed itself the Moral Majority. In fact there seems to be a Law of Conservation of Moralization, so that as old behaviors are taken out of the moralized column, new ones are added to it. Dozens of things that past generations treated as practical matters are now ethical battlegrounds, including disposable diapers, I.Q. tests, poultry farms, Barbie dolls and research on breast cancer. Food alone has become a minefield, with critics sermonizing about the size of sodas, the chemistry of fat, the freedom of chickens, the price of coffee beans, the species of fish and now the distance the food has traveled from farm to plate.


Many of these moralizations, like the assault on smoking, may be understood as practical tactics to reduce some recently identified harm. But whether an activity flips our mental switches to the “moral” setting isn’t just a matter of how much harm it does. We don’t show contempt to the man who fails to change the batteries in his smoke alarms or takes his family on a driving vacation, both of which multiply the risk they will die in an accident. Driving a gas-guzzling Hummer is reprehensible, but driving a gas-guzzling old Volvo is not; eating a Big Mac is unconscionable, but not imported cheese or crème brûlée. The reason for these double standards is obvious: people tend to align their moralization with their own lifestyles.


Reasoning and Rationalizing


It’s not just the content of our moral judgments that is often questionable, but the way we arrive at them. We like to think that when we have a conviction, there are good reasons that drove us to adopt it. That is why an older approach to moral psychology, led by Jean Piaget and Lawrence Kohlberg, tried to document the lines of reasoning that guided people to moral conclusions. But consider these situations, originally devised by the psychologist Jonathan Haidt:


Julie is traveling in France on summer vacation from college with her brother Mark. One night they decide that it would be interesting and fun if they tried making love. Julie was already taking birth-control pills, but Mark uses a condom, too, just to be safe. They both enjoy the sex but decide not to do it again. They keep the night as a special secret, which makes them feel closer to each other. What do you think about that — was it O.K. for them to make love?


A woman is cleaning out her closet and she finds her old American flag. She doesn’t want the flag anymore, so she cuts it up into pieces and uses the rags to clean her bathroom.


A family’s dog is killed by a car in front of their house. They heard that dog meat was delicious, so they cut up the dog’s body and cook it and eat it for dinner.


Most people immediately declare that these acts are wrong and then grope to justify why they are wrong. It’s not so easy. In the case of Julie and Mark, people raise the possibility of children with birth defects, but they are reminded that the couple were diligent about contraception. They suggest that the siblings will be emotionally hurt, but the story makes it clear that they weren’t. They submit that the act would offend the community, but then recall that it was kept a secret. Eventually many people admit, “I don’t know, I can’t explain it, I just know it’s wrong.” People don’t generally engage in moral reasoning, Haidt argues, but moral rationalization: they begin with the conclusion, coughed up by an unconscious emotion, and then work backward to a plausible justification.


The gap between people’s convictions and their justifications is also on display in the favorite new sandbox for moral psychologists, a thought experiment devised by the philosophers Philippa Foot and Judith Jarvis Thomson called the Trolley Problem. On your morning walk, you see a trolley car hurtling down the track, the conductor slumped over the controls. In the path of the trolley are five men working on the track, oblivious to the danger. You are standing at a fork in the track and can pull a lever that will divert the trolley onto a spur, saving the five men. Unfortunately, the trolley would then run over a single worker who is laboring on the spur. Is it permissible to throw the switch, killing one man to save five? Almost everyone says “yes.”


Consider now a different scene. You are on a bridge overlooking the tracks and have spotted the runaway trolley bearing down on the five workers. Now the only way to stop the trolley is to throw a heavy object in its path. And the only heavy object within reach is a fat man standing next to you. Should you throw the man off the bridge? Both dilemmas present you with the option of sacrificing one life to save five, and so, by the utilitarian standard of what would result in the greatest good for the greatest number, the two dilemmas are morally equivalent. But most people don’t see it that way: though they would pull the switch in the first dilemma, they would not heave the fat man in the second. When pressed for a reason, they can’t come up with anything coherent, though moral philosophers haven’t had an easy time coming up with a relevant difference, either.

To continue this article or see related comments and letters go to:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/13/magazine/13Psychology-t.html?ref=science

The Moral Instinct

Which of the following people would you say is the most admirable: Mother Teresa, Bill Gates or Norman Borlaug? And which do you think is the least admirable? For most people, it's an easy question. Mother Teresa, famous for ministering to the poor in Calcutta, has been beatified by the Vatican, awarded the Nobel Peace Prize and ranked in an American poll as the most admired person of the 20th century. Bill Gates, infamous for giving us the Microsoft dancing paper clip and the blue screen of death, has been decapitated in effigy in "I Hate Gates" Web sites and hit with a pie in the face. As for Norman Borlaug . . . who the heck is Norman Borlaug?

Yet a deeper look might lead you to rethink your answers. Borlaug, father of the "Green Revolution" that used agricultural science to reduce world hunger, has been credited with saving a billion lives, more than anyone else in history. Gates, in deciding what to do with his fortune, crunched the numbers and determined that he could alleviate the most misery by fighting everyday scourges in the developing world like malaria, diarrhea and parasites. Mother Teresa, for her part, extolled the virtue of suffering and ran her well-financed missions accordingly: their sick patrons were offered plenty of prayer but harsh conditions, few analgesics and dangerously primitive medical care.

It's not hard to see why the moral reputations of this trio should be so out of line with the good they have done. Mother Teresa was the very embodiment of saintliness: white-clad, sad-eyed, ascetic and often photographed with the wretched of the earth. Gates is a nerd's nerd and the world's richest man, as likely to enter heaven as the proverbial camel squeezing through the needle's eye. And Borlaug, now 93, is an agronomist who has spent his life in labs and nonprofits, seldom walking onto the media stage, and hence into our consciousness, at all.

I doubt these examples will persuade anyone to favor Bill Gates over Mother Teresa for sainthood. But they show that our heads can be turned by an aura of sanctity, distracting us from a more objective reckoning of the actions that make people suffer or flourish. It seems we may all be vulnerable to moral illusions the ethical equivalent of the bending lines that trick the eye on cereal boxes and in psychology textbooks. Illusions are a favorite tool of perception scientists for exposing the workings of the five senses, and of philosophers for shaking people out of the naive belief that our minds give us a transparent window onto the world (since if our eyes can be fooled by an illusion, why should we trust them at other times?). Today, a new field is using illusions to unmask a sixth sense, the moral sense. Moral intuitions are being drawn out of people in the lab, on Web sites and in brain scanners, and are being explained with tools from game theory, neuroscience and evolutionary biology.

"Two things fill the mind with ever new and increasing admiration and awe, the oftener and more steadily we reflect on them," wrote Immanuel Kant, "the starry heavens above and the moral law within." These days, the moral law within is being viewed with increasing awe, if not always admiration. The human moral sense turns out to be an organ of considerable complexity, with quirks that reflect its evolutionary history and its neurobiological foundations.

These quirks are bound to have implications for the human predicament. Morality is not just any old topic in psychology but close to our conception of the meaning of life. Moral goodness is what gives each of us the sense that we are worthy human beings. We seek it in our friends and mates, nurture it in our children, advance it in our politics and justify it with our religions. A disrespect for morality is blamed for everyday sins and history's worst atrocities. To carry this weight, the concept of morality would have to be bigger than any of us and outside all of us.

So dissecting moral intuitions is no small matter. If morality is a mere trick of the brain, some may fear, our very grounds for being moral could be eroded. Yet as we shall see, the science of the moral sense can instead be seen as a way to strengthen those grounds, by clarifying what morality is and how it should steer our actions.

The Moralization Switch

The starting point for appreciating that there is a distinctive part of our psychology for morality is seeing how moral judgments differ from other kinds of opinions we have on how people ought to behave. Moralization is a psychological state that can be turned on and off like a switch, and when it is on, a distinctive mind-set commandeers our thinking. This is the mind-set that makes us deem actions immoral (“killing is wrong”), rather than merely disagreeable (“I hate brussels sprouts”), unfashionable (“bell-bottoms are out”) or imprudent (“don’t scratch mosquito bites”).
 

The first hallmark of moralization is that the rules it invokes are felt to be universal. Prohibitions of rape and murder, for example, are felt not to be matters of local custom but to be universally and objectively warranted. One can easily say, “I don’t like brussels sprouts, but I don’t care if you eat them,” but no one would say, “I don’t like killing, but I don’t care if you murder someone.”

The other hallmark is that people feel that those who commit immoral acts deserve to be punished. Not only is it allowable to inflict pain on a person who has broken a moral rule; it is wrong not to, to “let them get away with it.” People are thus untroubled in inviting divine retribution or the power of the state to harm other people they deem immoral. Bertrand Russell wrote, “The infliction of cruelty with a good conscience is a delight to moralists — that is why they invented hell.”


We all know what it feels like when the moralization switch flips inside us — the righteous glow, the burning dudgeon, the drive to recruit others to the cause. The psychologist Paul Rozin has studied the toggle switch by comparing two kinds of people who engage in the same behavior but with different switch settings. Health vegetarians avoid meat for practical reasons, like lowering cholesterol and avoiding toxins. Moral vegetarians avoid meat for ethical reasons: to avoid complicity in the suffering of animals. By investigating their feelings about meat-eating, Rozin showed that the moral motive sets off a cascade of opinions. Moral vegetarians are more likely to treat meat as a contaminant — they refuse, for example, to eat a bowl of soup into which a drop of beef broth has fallen. They are more likely to think that other people ought to be vegetarians, and are more likely to imbue their dietary habits with other virtues, like believing that meat avoidance makes people less aggressive and bestial.


Much of our recent social history, including the culture wars between liberals and conservatives, consists of the moralization or amoralization of particular kinds of behavior. Even when people agree that an outcome is desirable, they may disagree on whether it should be treated as a matter of preference and prudence or as a matter of sin and virtue. Rozin notes, for example, that smoking has lately been moralized. Until recently, it was understood that some people didn’t enjoy smoking or avoided it because it was hazardous to their health. But with the discovery of the harmful effects of secondhand smoke, smoking is now treated as immoral. Smokers are ostracized; images of people smoking are censored; and entities touched by smoke are felt to be contaminated (so hotels have not only nonsmoking rooms but nonsmoking floors). The desire for retribution has been visited on tobacco companies, who have been slapped with staggering “punitive damages.”


At the same time, many behaviors have been amoralized, switched from moral failings to lifestyle choices. They include divorce, illegitimacy, being a working mother, marijuana use and homosexuality. Many afflictions have been reassigned from payback for bad choices to unlucky misfortunes. There used to be people called “bums” and “tramps”; today they are “homeless.” Drug addiction is a “disease”; syphilis was rebranded from the price of wanton behavior to a “sexually transmitted disease” and more recently a “sexually transmitted infection.”


This wave of amoralization has led the cultural right to lament that morality itself is under assault, as we see in the group that anointed itself the Moral Majority. In fact there seems to be a Law of Conservation of Moralization, so that as old behaviors are taken out of the moralized column, new ones are added to it. Dozens of things that past generations treated as practical matters are now ethical battlegrounds, including disposable diapers, I.Q. tests, poultry farms, Barbie dolls and research on breast cancer. Food alone has become a minefield, with critics sermonizing about the size of sodas, the chemistry of fat, the freedom of chickens, the price of coffee beans, the species of fish and now the distance the food has traveled from farm to plate.


Many of these moralizations, like the assault on smoking, may be understood as practical tactics to reduce some recently identified harm. But whether an activity flips our mental switches to the “moral” setting isn’t just a matter of how much harm it does. We don’t show contempt to the man who fails to change the batteries in his smoke alarms or takes his family on a driving vacation, both of which multiply the risk they will die in an accident. Driving a gas-guzzling Hummer is reprehensible, but driving a gas-guzzling old Volvo is not; eating a Big Mac is unconscionable, but not imported cheese or crème brûlée. The reason for these double standards is obvious: people tend to align their moralization with their own lifestyles.


Reasoning and Rationalizing


It’s not just the content of our moral judgments that is often questionable, but the way we arrive at them. We like to think that when we have a conviction, there are good reasons that drove us to adopt it. That is why an older approach to moral psychology, led by Jean Piaget and Lawrence Kohlberg, tried to document the lines of reasoning that guided people to moral conclusions. But consider these situations, originally devised by the psychologist Jonathan Haidt:


Julie is traveling in France on summer vacation from college with her brother Mark. One night they decide that it would be interesting and fun if they tried making love. Julie was already taking birth-control pills, but Mark uses a condom, too, just to be safe. They both enjoy the sex but decide not to do it again. They keep the night as a special secret, which makes them feel closer to each other. What do you think about that — was it O.K. for them to make love?


A woman is cleaning out her closet and she finds her old American flag. She doesn’t want the flag anymore, so she cuts it up into pieces and uses the rags to clean her bathroom.


A family’s dog is killed by a car in front of their house. They heard that dog meat was delicious, so they cut up the dog’s body and cook it and eat it for dinner.


Most people immediately declare that these acts are wrong and then grope to justify why they are wrong. It’s not so easy. In the case of Julie and Mark, people raise the possibility of children with birth defects, but they are reminded that the couple were diligent about contraception. They suggest that the siblings will be emotionally hurt, but the story makes it clear that they weren’t. They submit that the act would offend the community, but then recall that it was kept a secret. Eventually many people admit, “I don’t know, I can’t explain it, I just know it’s wrong.” People don’t generally engage in moral reasoning, Haidt argues, but moral rationalization: they begin with the conclusion, coughed up by an unconscious emotion, and then work backward to a plausible justification.


The gap between people’s convictions and their justifications is also on display in the favorite new sandbox for moral psychologists, a thought experiment devised by the philosophers Philippa Foot and Judith Jarvis Thomson called the Trolley Problem. On your morning walk, you see a trolley car hurtling down the track, the conductor slumped over the controls. In the path of the trolley are five men working on the track, oblivious to the danger. You are standing at a fork in the track and can pull a lever that will divert the trolley onto a spur, saving the five men. Unfortunately, the trolley would then run over a single worker who is laboring on the spur. Is it permissible to throw the switch, killing one man to save five? Almost everyone says “yes.”


Consider now a different scene. You are on a bridge overlooking the tracks and have spotted the runaway trolley bearing down on the five workers. Now the only way to stop the trolley is to throw a heavy object in its path. And the only heavy object within reach is a fat man standing next to you. Should you throw the man off the bridge? Both dilemmas present you with the option of sacrificing one life to save five, and so, by the utilitarian standard of what would result in the greatest good for the greatest number, the two dilemmas are morally equivalent. But most people don’t see it that way: though they would pull the switch in the first dilemma, they would not heave the fat man in the second. When pressed for a reason, they can’t come up with anything coherent, though moral philosophers haven’t had an easy time coming up with a relevant difference, either.

To continue this article or see related comments and letters go to:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/13/magazine/13Psychology-t.html?ref=science

Source type: Periodical
New York Times Magazine The Moral Instinct http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/13/magazine/13Psychology-t.html?ref=science
Contribution #2725

Source (click to close)

Source type: Periodical
New York Times Magazine The Moral Instinct http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/13/magazine/13Psychology-t.html?ref=science
Contribution #2725


excerpt from The Voice of the Master
In this passage Almuhtada, the Disciple, speaks to the people of the city in the voice of his deceased Master.  He challenges the multitude to contrast virtue and vice in their many walks of life. Following this speech, he will enter monastic seclusion.  
Come, let me gaze at you, and learn whether you are of those entering into the world of light, or of those going forth into the land of darkness.  Come, tell me who you are and what you are.

Are you a politician who says to himself:  "I will use my country for my own benefit'?  If so, you are naught but a parasite living on the flesh of others.  Or are you a devoted patriot, who whispers into the ear of his inner self:  'I love to serve my country as a faithful servant.'  If so , you are an oasis in the desert, ready to quench the thirst of the wayfarer.

Or are you a merchang, drawing advantage from the needs of the people, engrossing goods so as to resell them at an exorbitant price?  If so, you are a reporbate; and it matters naught whether your home is a palace or a prison.

Or are you an honest man, who enables farmer and weaver to exchange their products, who mediates between buyer and seller, and through his just ways profits both himself and others?

If so, you are a righteous man; and it matters not whether you are praised or blamed.

Are you a leader of religion, who weaves out of the simplicity of the faithful a scarlet robe fore his body; and of their kindness a golden crown for his head; and while living on Satan's plenty, spews forth his hatred of Satan?  If so, you are a heretic; and it matters not that you fast all day and pray all night.

Or are you the faithful one who finds in the goodness of people a groundwork for the betterment of the whole nation; and in whose soul is the ladder of perfection leading to the Holy Spirit?  If you are such, you are like a lily in the garden of Truth; and it matters not if your fragrance is lost upon men, or dispersed into the air, where it will be eternally preserved.

Or are you a journalist who sells his principles in the markets of slaves and who fattens on gossip and misfortune and crime?  If so, you are like a ravenous vulture preying upon rotting carrion.

Or are you a teacher standing upon the raised stage of history, who, inspired by the glories of the past, preaches to mankind and acts as he preaches?  If so, you are a restorative to ailing humanity and a balm for the wounded heart.

Are you a governor looking down on those you govern, never stirring abroad except to rifle their pockets or to exploit them for your own profit?  If so, you are like tares upon the threshing floor of the nation.

Are you a deveoted servant who loves the people and is ever watchful over their welfare, and zealous for their success?  If so, you are as a blessing in the granaries of the land.

Or are you a husband who regards the wrongs he has committed as lawful, bot those of his wife as unlawful?  If so, you are like those extinct savages who lived in caves and covered their nakedness with hides.

Or are you a faithful companion, whose wife is ever at his side, sharing his every thought, rapture, and victory?  If so, you are as one who at dawn walks at the head of a nation toward the high noon of justice, reason and wisdom.

Are you a writer who holds his head high above the crowd, while his brain is deep in the abyss of the past, that is filled with the tatters and useless cast-offs of the ages?  If so, you are like a stagnant pool of water.

Or are you the keen thinker, who scrutinizes his inner self, discarding that which is useless, outworn and evil, but preserving that which is useful and good?  If so, you are as manna to the hungry, and as cool clear water to the thirsty. 

Are you a poet full of noise and empty sounds?  If so, you are like one of those mountebanks that make us laugh when they are weeping, and make us weep, when they laugh.

Or are you one of those gifted souls in whose hands God has placed a viol to soothe the spirit with heavenly music, and bring his fellow men close to Life and the Beauty of Life?  If so, you are a torch to light us on our way, a sweet longing in our hearts, and a revelation of the divine in our dreams.

Thus is mankind divided into two long columns, one composed of the aged and bent, who support themselves on crooked staves, and as they walk on the path of Life, they pant as if they were climbing toward a mountaintop, while they are actually descending into the abyss.  

And the second column is composed of youth, running as with winged feet, singing as if their throats were strung with silver strings, and climbing toward the mountaintop as though drawn by some irresisbible magic power.  

In which of these two processions do you belong, my brethren?  Ask yourselves this question, when you are alone in the silence of the night.

Judge for yourselves whether you belong with the Slaves of Yesterday or the Free Men of Tomorrow. 

excerpt from The Voice of the Master

Come, let me gaze at you, and learn whether you are of those entering into the world of light, or of those going forth into the land of darkness.  Come, tell me who you are and what you are.

Are you a politician who says to himself:  "I will use my country for my own benefit'?  If so, you are naught but a parasite living on the flesh of others.  Or are you a devoted patriot, who whispers into the ear of his inner self:  'I love to serve my country as a faithful servant.'  If so , you are an oasis in the desert, ready to quench the thirst of the wayfarer.

Or are you a merchang, drawing advantage from the needs of the people, engrossing goods so as to resell them at an exorbitant price?  If so, you are a reporbate; and it matters naught whether your home is a palace or a prison.

Or are you an honest man, who enables farmer and weaver to exchange their products, who mediates between buyer and seller, and through his just ways profits both himself and others?

If so, you are a righteous man; and it matters not whether you are praised or blamed.

Are you a leader of religion, who weaves out of the simplicity of the faithful a scarlet robe fore his body; and of their kindness a golden crown for his head; and while living on Satan's plenty, spews forth his hatred of Satan?  If so, you are a heretic; and it matters not that you fast all day and pray all night.

Or are you the faithful one who finds in the goodness of people a groundwork for the betterment of the whole nation; and in whose soul is the ladder of perfection leading to the Holy Spirit?  If you are such, you are like a lily in the garden of Truth; and it matters not if your fragrance is lost upon men, or dispersed into the air, where it will be eternally preserved.

Or are you a journalist who sells his principles in the markets of slaves and who fattens on gossip and misfortune and crime?  If so, you are like a ravenous vulture preying upon rotting carrion.

Or are you a teacher standing upon the raised stage of history, who, inspired by the glories of the past, preaches to mankind and acts as he preaches?  If so, you are a restorative to ailing humanity and a balm for the wounded heart.

Are you a governor looking down on those you govern, never stirring abroad except to rifle their pockets or to exploit them for your own profit?  If so, you are like tares upon the threshing floor of the nation.

Are you a deveoted servant who loves the people and is ever watchful over their welfare, and zealous for their success?  If so, you are as a blessing in the granaries of the land.

Or are you a husband who regards the wrongs he has committed as lawful, bot those of his wife as unlawful?  If so, you are like those extinct savages who lived in caves and covered their nakedness with hides.

Or are you a faithful companion, whose wife is ever at his side, sharing his every thought, rapture, and victory?  If so, you are as one who at dawn walks at the head of a nation toward the high noon of justice, reason and wisdom.

Are you a writer who holds his head high above the crowd, while his brain is deep in the abyss of the past, that is filled with the tatters and useless cast-offs of the ages?  If so, you are like a stagnant pool of water.

Or are you the keen thinker, who scrutinizes his inner self, discarding that which is useless, outworn and evil, but preserving that which is useful and good?  If so, you are as manna to the hungry, and as cool clear water to the thirsty. 

Are you a poet full of noise and empty sounds?  If so, you are like one of those mountebanks that make us laugh when they are weeping, and make us weep, when they laugh.

Or are you one of those gifted souls in whose hands God has placed a viol to soothe the spirit with heavenly music, and bring his fellow men close to Life and the Beauty of Life?  If so, you are a torch to light us on our way, a sweet longing in our hearts, and a revelation of the divine in our dreams.

Thus is mankind divided into two long columns, one composed of the aged and bent, who support themselves on crooked staves, and as they walk on the path of Life, they pant as if they were climbing toward a mountaintop, while they are actually descending into the abyss.  

And the second column is composed of youth, running as with winged feet, singing as if their throats were strung with silver strings, and climbing toward the mountaintop as though drawn by some irresisbible magic power.  

In which of these two processions do you belong, my brethren?  Ask yourselves this question, when you are alone in the silence of the night.

Judge for yourselves whether you belong with the Slaves of Yesterday or the Free Men of Tomorrow. 
Source type: Book
The Voice of the Master
by trans from Arabic by Anthony R Ferris
Page 33-37
Published by Citadel Press , New York , 1958
http://
Contribution #1847

Source (click to close)

Source type: Book
The Voice of the Master
by trans from Arabic by Anthony R Ferris
Page 33-37
Published by Citadel Press , New York , 1958
http://
Contribution #1847


Education and Discipline
Education, viewed from a social standpoint, must be something more positive than a mere opportunity for growth. It must, of course, provide this, but it must also provide a mental and moral equipment which children cannot acquire entirely for themselves.

      Any serious educational theory must consist of two parts: a conception of the ends of life, and a science of psychological dynamics, i.e. of the laws of mental change. Two men who differ as to the ends of life cannot hope to agree about education. The educational machine, throughout Western civilization, is dominated by two ethical theories: that of Christianity, and that of nationalism. These two, when taken seriously, are incompatible, as is becoming evident in Germany. For my part, I hold that, where they differ, Christianity is preferable, but where they agree, both are mistaken. The conception which I should substitute as the purpose of education is civilization, a term which, as I mean it, has a definition which is partly individual, partly social. It consists, in the individual, of both intellectual and moral qualities: intellectually, a certain minimum of general knowledge, technical skill in one's own profession, and a habit of forming opinions on evidence; morally, of impartiality, kindliness, and a modicum of self-control. I should add a quality which is neither moral nor intellectual, but perhaps physiological: zest and joy of life. In communities, civilization demands respect for law, justice as between man and man, purposes not involving permanent injury to any section of the human race, and intelligent adaptation of means to ends. If these are to be the purpose of education, it is a question for the science of psychology to consider what can be done towards realizing them, and, in particular, what degree of freedom is likely to prove most effective.

      On the question of freedom in education there are at present three main schools of thought, deriving partly from differences as to ends and partly from differences in psychological theory. There are those who say that children should be completely free, however bad they may be; there are those who say they should be completely subject to authority, however good they may be; and there are those who say they should be free, but in spite of freedom they should be always good. This last party is larger than it has any logical right to be; children, like adults, will not all be virtuous if they are all free. The belief that liberty will ensure moral perfection is a relic of Rousseauism, and would not survive a study of animals and babies. Those who hold this belief think that education should have no positive purpose, but should merely offer an environment suitable for spontaneous development. I cannot agree with this school, which seems to me too individualistic, and unduly indifferent to the importance of knowledge. We live in communities which require co-operation, and it would be utopian to expect all the necessary co-operation to result from spontaneous impulse. The existence of a large population on a limited area is only possible owing to science and technique; education must, therefore, hand on the necessary minimum of these. The educators who allow most freedom are men whose success depends upon a degree of benevolence, self-control, and trained intelligence which can hardly be generated where every impulse is left unchecked; their merits, therefore, are not likely to be perpetuated if their methods are undiluted. Education, viewed from a social standpoint, must be something more positive than a mere opportunity for growth. It must, of course, provide this, but it must also provide a mental and moral equipment which children cannot acquire entirely for themselves.

The arguments in favour of a great degree of freedom in education are derived not from man's natural goodness, but from the effects of authority, both on those who suffer it and on those who exercise it. Those who are subject to authority become either submissive or rebellious, and each attitude has its drawbacks.

      The submissive lose initiative, both in thought and action; moreover, the anger generated by the feeling of being thwarted tends to find an outlet in bullying those who are weaker. That is why tyrannical institutions are self-perpetuating: what a man has suffered from his father he inflicts upon his son, and the humiliations which he remembers having endured at his public school he passes on to Ònatives" when he becomes an empire-builder. Thus an unduly authoritative education turns the pupils into timid tyrants, incapable of either claiming or tolerating originality in word or deed. The effect upon the educators is even worse: they tend to become sadistic disciplinarians, glad to inspire terror, and content to inspire nothing else. As these men represent knowledge, the pupils acquire a horror of knowledge, which, among the English upper-class, is supposed to be part of human nature, but is really part of the well-grounded hatred of the authoritarian pedagogue.

Rebels, on the other hand,, though they may be necessary, can hardly be just to what exists. Moreover, there are many ways of rebelling, and only a small minority of these are wise. Galileo was a rebel and was wise; believers in the flat-earth theory are equally rebels, but are foolish. There is a great danger in the tendency to suppose that opposition to authority is essentially meritorious and that unconventional opinions are bound to be correct: no useful purpose is served by smashing lamp-posts or maintaining Shakespeare to be no poet. Yet this excessive rebelliousness is often the effect that too much authority has on spirited pupils. And when rebels become educators, they sometimes encourage defiance in their pupils, for whom at the same time they are trying to produce a perfect environment, although these two aims are scarcely compatible.

      What is wanted is neither submissiveness nor rebellion, but good nature, and general friendliness both to people and to new ideas. These qualities are due in part to physical causes, to which old-fashioned educators paid too little attention; but they are due still more to freedom from the feeling of baffled impotence which arises when vital impulses are thwarted. If the young are to grow into friendly adults, it is necessary, in most cases, that they should feel their environment friendly. This requires that there should be a certain sympathy with the child's important desires, and not merely an attempt to use him for some abstract end such as the glory of God or the greatness of one's country. And, in teaching, every attempt should be made to cause the pupil to feel that it is worth his while to know what is being taught-at least when this is true. When the pupil co-operates willingly, he learns twice as fast and with half the fatigue. All these are valid reasons for a very great degree of freedom.

      It is easy, however, to carry the argument too far. It is not desirable that children, in avoiding the vices of the slave, should acquire those of the aristocrat. Consideration for others, not only in great matters, but also in little everyday things, is an essential element in civilization, without which social life would be intolerable. I am not thinking of mere forms of politeness, such as saying "please" and "thank you": formal manners are most fully developed among barbarians, and diminish with every advance in culture. I am thinking rather of willingness to take a fair share of necessary work, to be obliging in small ways that save trouble on the balance. Sanity itself is a form of politeness and it is not desirable to give a child a sense of omnipotence, or a belief that adults exist only to minister to the pleasures of the young. And those who disapprove of the existence of the idle rich are hardly consistent if they bring up their children without any sense that work is necessary, and without the habits that make continuous application possible.

There is another consideration to which some advocates of freedom attach too little importance. In a community of children which is left without adult interference there is a tyranny of the stronger, which is likely to be far more brutal than most adult tyranny. If two children of two or three years old are left to play together, they will, after a few fights, discover which is bound to be the victor, and the other will then become a slave. Where the number of children is larger, one or two acquire complete mastery, and the others have far less liberty than they would have if the adults interfered to protect the weaker and less pugnacious. Consideration for others does not, with most children, arise spontaneously, but has to be taught, and can hardly be taught except by the exercise of authority. This is perhaps the most important argument against the abdication of the adults.

      I do not think that educators have yet solved the problem of combining the desirable forms of freedom with the necessary minimum of moral training. The right solution, it must be admitted, is often made impossible by parents before the child is brought to an enlightened school. just as psychoanalysts, from their clinical experience, conclude that we are all mad, so the authorities in modern schools, from their contact with pupils whose parents have made them unmanageable, are disposed to conclude that all children are "difficult" and all parents utterly foolish. Children who have been driven wild by parental tyranny (which often takes the form of solicitous affection) may require a longer or shorter period of complete liberty before they can view any adult without suspicion. But children who have been sensibly handled at home can bear to be checked in minor ways, so long as they feel that they are being helped in the ways that they themselves regard as important. Adults who like children, and are not reduced to a condition of nervous exhaustion by their company, can achieve a great deal in the way of discipline without ceasing to be regarded with friendly feelings by their pupils.

      I think modern educational theorists are inclined to attach too much importance to the negative virtue of not interfering with children, and too little to the positive merit of enjoying their company. If you have the sort of liking for children that many people have for horses or dogs, they will be apt to respond to your suggestions, and to accept prohibitions, perhaps with some good-humoured grumbling, but without resentment. It is no use to have the sort of liking that consists in regarding them as a field for valuable social endeavour, or what amounts to the same thingÑas an outlet for power-impulses. No child will be grateful for an interest in him that springs from the thought that he will have a vote to be secured for your party or a body to be sacrificed to king and country. The desirable sort of interest is that which consists in spontaneous pleasure in the presence of children, without any ulterior purpose. Teachers who have this quality will seldom need to interfere with children's freedom, but will be able to do so, when necessary, without causing psychological damage.

      Unfortunately, it is utterly impossible for over-worked teachers to preserve an instinctive liking for children; they are bound to come to feel towards them as the proverbial confectioner's apprentice does towards macaroons. I do not think that education ought to be anyone's whole profession: it should be undertaken for at most two hours a day by people whose remaining hours are spent away from children. The society of the young is fatiguing, especially when strict discipline is avoided. Fatigue, in the end, produces irritation, which is likely to express itself somehow, whatever theories the harassed teacher may have taught himself or herself to believe. The necessary friendliness cannot be preserved by self-control alone. But where it exists, it should be unnecessary to have rules in advance as to how "naughty" children are to be treated, since impulse is likely to lead to the right decision, and almost any decision will be right if the child feels that you like him. No rules, however wise, are a substitute for affection and tact.

 

Education and Discipline

      Any serious educational theory must consist of two parts: a conception of the ends of life, and a science of psychological dynamics, i.e. of the laws of mental change. Two men who differ as to the ends of life cannot hope to agree about education. The educational machine, throughout Western civilization, is dominated by two ethical theories: that of Christianity, and that of nationalism. These two, when taken seriously, are incompatible, as is becoming evident in Germany. For my part, I hold that, where they differ, Christianity is preferable, but where they agree, both are mistaken. The conception which I should substitute as the purpose of education is civilization, a term which, as I mean it, has a definition which is partly individual, partly social. It consists, in the individual, of both intellectual and moral qualities: intellectually, a certain minimum of general knowledge, technical skill in one's own profession, and a habit of forming opinions on evidence; morally, of impartiality, kindliness, and a modicum of self-control. I should add a quality which is neither moral nor intellectual, but perhaps physiological: zest and joy of life. In communities, civilization demands respect for law, justice as between man and man, purposes not involving permanent injury to any section of the human race, and intelligent adaptation of means to ends. If these are to be the purpose of education, it is a question for the science of psychology to consider what can be done towards realizing them, and, in particular, what degree of freedom is likely to prove most effective.

      On the question of freedom in education there are at present three main schools of thought, deriving partly from differences as to ends and partly from differences in psychological theory. There are those who say that children should be completely free, however bad they may be; there are those who say they should be completely subject to authority, however good they may be; and there are those who say they should be free, but in spite of freedom they should be always good. This last party is larger than it has any logical right to be; children, like adults, will not all be virtuous if they are all free. The belief that liberty will ensure moral perfection is a relic of Rousseauism, and would not survive a study of animals and babies. Those who hold this belief think that education should have no positive purpose, but should merely offer an environment suitable for spontaneous development. I cannot agree with this school, which seems to me too individualistic, and unduly indifferent to the importance of knowledge. We live in communities which require co-operation, and it would be utopian to expect all the necessary co-operation to result from spontaneous impulse. The existence of a large population on a limited area is only possible owing to science and technique; education must, therefore, hand on the necessary minimum of these. The educators who allow most freedom are men whose success depends upon a degree of benevolence, self-control, and trained intelligence which can hardly be generated where every impulse is left unchecked; their merits, therefore, are not likely to be perpetuated if their methods are undiluted. Education, viewed from a social standpoint, must be something more positive than a mere opportunity for growth. It must, of course, provide this, but it must also provide a mental and moral equipment which children cannot acquire entirely for themselves.

The arguments in favour of a great degree of freedom in education are derived not from man's natural goodness, but from the effects of authority, both on those who suffer it and on those who exercise it. Those who are subject to authority become either submissive or rebellious, and each attitude has its drawbacks.

      The submissive lose initiative, both in thought and action; moreover, the anger generated by the feeling of being thwarted tends to find an outlet in bullying those who are weaker. That is why tyrannical institutions are self-perpetuating: what a man has suffered from his father he inflicts upon his son, and the humiliations which he remembers having endured at his public school he passes on to Ònatives" when he becomes an empire-builder. Thus an unduly authoritative education turns the pupils into timid tyrants, incapable of either claiming or tolerating originality in word or deed. The effect upon the educators is even worse: they tend to become sadistic disciplinarians, glad to inspire terror, and content to inspire nothing else. As these men represent knowledge, the pupils acquire a horror of knowledge, which, among the English upper-class, is supposed to be part of human nature, but is really part of the well-grounded hatred of the authoritarian pedagogue.

Rebels, on the other hand,, though they may be necessary, can hardly be just to what exists. Moreover, there are many ways of rebelling, and only a small minority of these are wise. Galileo was a rebel and was wise; believers in the flat-earth theory are equally rebels, but are foolish. There is a great danger in the tendency to suppose that opposition to authority is essentially meritorious and that unconventional opinions are bound to be correct: no useful purpose is served by smashing lamp-posts or maintaining Shakespeare to be no poet. Yet this excessive rebelliousness is often the effect that too much authority has on spirited pupils. And when rebels become educators, they sometimes encourage defiance in their pupils, for whom at the same time they are trying to produce a perfect environment, although these two aims are scarcely compatible.

      What is wanted is neither submissiveness nor rebellion, but good nature, and general friendliness both to people and to new ideas. These qualities are due in part to physical causes, to which old-fashioned educators paid too little attention; but they are due still more to freedom from the feeling of baffled impotence which arises when vital impulses are thwarted. If the young are to grow into friendly adults, it is necessary, in most cases, that they should feel their environment friendly. This requires that there should be a certain sympathy with the child's important desires, and not merely an attempt to use him for some abstract end such as the glory of God or the greatness of one's country. And, in teaching, every attempt should be made to cause the pupil to feel that it is worth his while to know what is being taught-at least when this is true. When the pupil co-operates willingly, he learns twice as fast and with half the fatigue. All these are valid reasons for a very great degree of freedom.

      It is easy, however, to carry the argument too far. It is not desirable that children, in avoiding the vices of the slave, should acquire those of the aristocrat. Consideration for others, not only in great matters, but also in little everyday things, is an essential element in civilization, without which social life would be intolerable. I am not thinking of mere forms of politeness, such as saying "please" and "thank you": formal manners are most fully developed among barbarians, and diminish with every advance in culture. I am thinking rather of willingness to take a fair share of necessary work, to be obliging in small ways that save trouble on the balance. Sanity itself is a form of politeness and it is not desirable to give a child a sense of omnipotence, or a belief that adults exist only to minister to the pleasures of the young. And those who disapprove of the existence of the idle rich are hardly consistent if they bring up their children without any sense that work is necessary, and without the habits that make continuous application possible.

There is another consideration to which some advocates of freedom attach too little importance. In a community of children which is left without adult interference there is a tyranny of the stronger, which is likely to be far more brutal than most adult tyranny. If two children of two or three years old are left to play together, they will, after a few fights, discover which is bound to be the victor, and the other will then become a slave. Where the number of children is larger, one or two acquire complete mastery, and the others have far less liberty than they would have if the adults interfered to protect the weaker and less pugnacious. Consideration for others does not, with most children, arise spontaneously, but has to be taught, and can hardly be taught except by the exercise of authority. This is perhaps the most important argument against the abdication of the adults.

      I do not think that educators have yet solved the problem of combining the desirable forms of freedom with the necessary minimum of moral training. The right solution, it must be admitted, is often made impossible by parents before the child is brought to an enlightened school. just as psychoanalysts, from their clinical experience, conclude that we are all mad, so the authorities in modern schools, from their contact with pupils whose parents have made them unmanageable, are disposed to conclude that all children are "difficult" and all parents utterly foolish. Children who have been driven wild by parental tyranny (which often takes the form of solicitous affection) may require a longer or shorter period of complete liberty before they can view any adult without suspicion. But children who have been sensibly handled at home can bear to be checked in minor ways, so long as they feel that they are being helped in the ways that they themselves regard as important. Adults who like children, and are not reduced to a condition of nervous exhaustion by their company, can achieve a great deal in the way of discipline without ceasing to be regarded with friendly feelings by their pupils.

      I think modern educational theorists are inclined to attach too much importance to the negative virtue of not interfering with children, and too little to the positive merit of enjoying their company. If you have the sort of liking for children that many people have for horses or dogs, they will be apt to respond to your suggestions, and to accept prohibitions, perhaps with some good-humoured grumbling, but without resentment. It is no use to have the sort of liking that consists in regarding them as a field for valuable social endeavour, or what amounts to the same thingÑas an outlet for power-impulses. No child will be grateful for an interest in him that springs from the thought that he will have a vote to be secured for your party or a body to be sacrificed to king and country. The desirable sort of interest is that which consists in spontaneous pleasure in the presence of children, without any ulterior purpose. Teachers who have this quality will seldom need to interfere with children's freedom, but will be able to do so, when necessary, without causing psychological damage.

      Unfortunately, it is utterly impossible for over-worked teachers to preserve an instinctive liking for children; they are bound to come to feel towards them as the proverbial confectioner's apprentice does towards macaroons. I do not think that education ought to be anyone's whole profession: it should be undertaken for at most two hours a day by people whose remaining hours are spent away from children. The society of the young is fatiguing, especially when strict discipline is avoided. Fatigue, in the end, produces irritation, which is likely to express itself somehow, whatever theories the harassed teacher may have taught himself or herself to believe. The necessary friendliness cannot be preserved by self-control alone. But where it exists, it should be unnecessary to have rules in advance as to how "naughty" children are to be treated, since impulse is likely to lead to the right decision, and almost any decision will be right if the child feels that you like him. No rules, however wise, are a substitute for affection and tact.

 

Source type: Website
Bertrand Russell
http://www.rjgeib.com/thoughts/russell/russell.html
Contribution #1758

Source (click to close)

Source type: Website
Bertrand Russell
http://www.rjgeib.com/thoughts/russell/russell.html
Contribution #1758


excerpt from East of Eden
A child may ask, "What is the world's story about?" And a grown man or woman may wonder, "What way will the world go? How does it end and, while we're at it, what's the story about?"

      I believer that there is one story in the world, and only one, that has frightened and inspired us, so that we live in a Peral White serial of continuing thought and wonder. Humans are caught - in their lives, in their thoughts, in their hungers and ambitions, in their avarice and cruelty, and in their kindness and generosity too - in a net of good and evil. I think this is the only story we have and that it occurs on all levels of feeling and intelligence. Virtue and vice were warp and woof of our first consciousness, and they will be the fabric of our last, and this despite any changes we may impose on river and mountain, on economy and manners. There is no other story. A man, after he has brushed off the dust and chips of his life, will have only the hard, clean questions: Was it good or was it evil? Have I done well - or ill?...

      ...And in our time, when a man dies - if he has had wealth and influence and power and all the vestments that arouse envy, and after the living take stock of the dead man's property and his eminence and works and monuments - the question is still there: Was his life good or was it evil? - which is another way of putting Croesus's question. Envies are gone, and the measuring stick is: "Was he loved or was he hated? Is his death felt as a loss or does a kind of joy come from it?"

      I remember clearly the deaths of three men. One was the richest man of the century, who, having clawed his way to wealth through the souls and bodies of men, spent many years trying to buy back the love he had forfeited and by that process performed great service to the world and, perhaps, had much more than balanced the evils of his rise. I was on a ship when he died. The news was posted on the bulletin board, and nearly everyone received the news with pleasure. Several said, "Thank God that son of a bitch is dead."

      There was a man, smart as Satan, who, lacking some perception of human dignity and knowing all too well every aspect of human weakness and wickedness, used his special knowledge to warp men, to buy men, to bribe and threaten and seduce until he found himself in a position of great power. He clothed his motives in the name of virtue, and I have wondered whether he knew that no gift will ever buy back a man's love when you have removed his self-love. A bribed man can only hate his briber. When this man died the nation rang with praise and, just beneath, with gladness that he was dead.

      There was a third man, who perhaps made many errors in performance but whose effective life was devoted to making men brave and dignified and good in a time when they were poor and frightened and when ugly forces were loose in the world to utilize those fears. This man was hated by the few. When he died the people burst into tears in the streets and their minds wailed, "What can we do now? How can we go on without him?"

      In uncertainty I am certain that underneath their topmost layers of frailty men want to be good and want to be loved. Indeed, most of their vices are attempted short cuts to love. When a man comes to die, no matter what his talents and influence and genius, if he dies unloved his life must be a failure to him and his dying a cold horror. It seems to me that if you or I must choose between two courses of thought or action, we should remember our dying and try to live that our death brings no pleasure to the world.

      We have only one story. All novels, all poetry, are built on the never-ending contest in ourselves of good and evil. And it occurs to me that evil must constantly respawn, while good, while virtue, is immortal. Vice has always a new fresh young face, while virtue is venerable as nothing else in the world is.

excerpt from East of Eden

A child may ask, "What is the world's story about?" And a grown man or woman may wonder, "What way will the world go? How does it end and, while we're at it, what's the story about?"

      I believer that there is one story in the world, and only one, that has frightened and inspired us, so that we live in a Peral White serial of continuing thought and wonder. Humans are caught - in their lives, in their thoughts, in their hungers and ambitions, in their avarice and cruelty, and in their kindness and generosity too - in a net of good and evil. I think this is the only story we have and that it occurs on all levels of feeling and intelligence. Virtue and vice were warp and woof of our first consciousness, and they will be the fabric of our last, and this despite any changes we may impose on river and mountain, on economy and manners. There is no other story. A man, after he has brushed off the dust and chips of his life, will have only the hard, clean questions: Was it good or was it evil? Have I done well - or ill?...

      ...And in our time, when a man dies - if he has had wealth and influence and power and all the vestments that arouse envy, and after the living take stock of the dead man's property and his eminence and works and monuments - the question is still there: Was his life good or was it evil? - which is another way of putting Croesus's question. Envies are gone, and the measuring stick is: "Was he loved or was he hated? Is his death felt as a loss or does a kind of joy come from it?"

      I remember clearly the deaths of three men. One was the richest man of the century, who, having clawed his way to wealth through the souls and bodies of men, spent many years trying to buy back the love he had forfeited and by that process performed great service to the world and, perhaps, had much more than balanced the evils of his rise. I was on a ship when he died. The news was posted on the bulletin board, and nearly everyone received the news with pleasure. Several said, "Thank God that son of a bitch is dead."

      There was a man, smart as Satan, who, lacking some perception of human dignity and knowing all too well every aspect of human weakness and wickedness, used his special knowledge to warp men, to buy men, to bribe and threaten and seduce until he found himself in a position of great power. He clothed his motives in the name of virtue, and I have wondered whether he knew that no gift will ever buy back a man's love when you have removed his self-love. A bribed man can only hate his briber. When this man died the nation rang with praise and, just beneath, with gladness that he was dead.

      There was a third man, who perhaps made many errors in performance but whose effective life was devoted to making men brave and dignified and good in a time when they were poor and frightened and when ugly forces were loose in the world to utilize those fears. This man was hated by the few. When he died the people burst into tears in the streets and their minds wailed, "What can we do now? How can we go on without him?"

      In uncertainty I am certain that underneath their topmost layers of frailty men want to be good and want to be loved. Indeed, most of their vices are attempted short cuts to love. When a man comes to die, no matter what his talents and influence and genius, if he dies unloved his life must be a failure to him and his dying a cold horror. It seems to me that if you or I must choose between two courses of thought or action, we should remember our dying and try to live that our death brings no pleasure to the world.

      We have only one story. All novels, all poetry, are built on the never-ending contest in ourselves of good and evil. And it occurs to me that evil must constantly respawn, while good, while virtue, is immortal. Vice has always a new fresh young face, while virtue is venerable as nothing else in the world is.

Source type: Book
East of Eden
http://www.rjgeib.com/thoughts/glad/glad.html
Contribution #1721

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Source type: Book
East of Eden
http://www.rjgeib.com/thoughts/glad/glad.html
Contribution #1721


I am amazed at the heart of man: It possesses the substance of wisdom as well as the opposites contrary to it ... for if hope arises in it, it is brought low by covetousness: and if covetousness is aroused in it, greed destroys it. If despair possesses it, self piety kills it: and if it is seized by anger, this is intensified by rage. If it is blessed with contentment, then it forgets to be careful; and if it is filled with fear, then it becomes preoccupied with being cautious. If it feels secure , then it is overcome by vain hopes; and if it is given wealth, then its independence makes it extravagant. If want strikes it, then it is smitten by anxiety. If it is weakened by hunger, then it gives way to exhaustion; and if it goes too far in satisfying its appetites, then its inner becomes clogged up. So all its shortcomings are harmful to it, and all its excesses corrupt it.




 

I am amazed at the heart of man: It possesses the substance of wisdom as well as the opposites contrary to it ... for if hope arises in it, it is brought low by covetousness: and if covetousness is aroused in it, greed destroys it. If despair possesses it, self piety kills it: and if it is seized by anger, this is intensified by rage. If it is blessed with contentment, then it forgets to be careful; and if it is filled with fear, then it becomes preoccupied with being cautious. If it feels secure , then it is overcome by vain hopes; and if it is given wealth, then its independence makes it extravagant. If want strikes it, then it is smitten by anxiety. If it is weakened by hunger, then it gives way to exhaustion; and if it goes too far in satisfying its appetites, then its inner becomes clogged up. So all its shortcomings are harmful to it, and all its excesses corrupt it.




 

Source type: Website
Imam Ali
http://www.virtuescience.com/sayings.html
Viewed on April 30, 2008
Contribution #1159

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Source type: Website
Imam Ali
http://www.virtuescience.com/sayings.html
Viewed on April 30, 2008
Contribution #1159


Consciousness and Virtues
. . . It was a suprise to me that as you become silent, as you become conscious, more alert, your actions start changing - but not vice versa. You can change your actions, but that will not make you more conscious. You become more conscious and your actions will change - that's absolutely simple and scientific. You were doing something stupid; as you become more alert and more conscious, you cannot do it.

It's not a question of reward or punishment. It is simply your consciousness, your silence, your peace, which makes you look so far away and so deep into everything that you do. You cannot do harm to anybody; you cannot be violent: you cannot be angry, you cannot be greedy, you cannot be ambitious. Your consciousness has given you so much blissfulness...what can greed give you except anxiety? What can ambition give you? Just a continuous struggle to reach high on some ladder.

As your consciousness becomes more settled, all your life patterns change. What religions have called sin will disappear from your life, and what they have called virtue will automatically flow from your being, from your actions. But they have been doing just vice versa: first change the acts. It is as if you are in a dark house and you are stumbling, light is not possible. What I am saying is, bring light in and stumbling will disappear, because when there is light why should you stumble over things?

Every time you stumble, every time you hit your head on a wall it hurts. It is a punishment in itself - a wrong act is a punishment in itself; there is nobody recording your acts. And every beautiful action is a reward unto itself. But first bring light into your life.

Meditation is an effort to bring light and to bring joy and to bring silence and to bring blissfulness, and out of this beautiful world of meditation it is impossible for you to do anything wrong.

Consciousness and Virtues

. . . It was a suprise to me that as you become silent, as you become conscious, more alert, your actions start changing - but not vice versa. You can change your actions, but that will not make you more conscious. You become more conscious and your actions will change - that's absolutely simple and scientific. You were doing something stupid; as you become more alert and more conscious, you cannot do it.

It's not a question of reward or punishment. It is simply your consciousness, your silence, your peace, which makes you look so far away and so deep into everything that you do. You cannot do harm to anybody; you cannot be violent: you cannot be angry, you cannot be greedy, you cannot be ambitious. Your consciousness has given you so much blissfulness...what can greed give you except anxiety? What can ambition give you? Just a continuous struggle to reach high on some ladder.

As your consciousness becomes more settled, all your life patterns change. What religions have called sin will disappear from your life, and what they have called virtue will automatically flow from your being, from your actions. But they have been doing just vice versa: first change the acts. It is as if you are in a dark house and you are stumbling, light is not possible. What I am saying is, bring light in and stumbling will disappear, because when there is light why should you stumble over things?

Every time you stumble, every time you hit your head on a wall it hurts. It is a punishment in itself - a wrong act is a punishment in itself; there is nobody recording your acts. And every beautiful action is a reward unto itself. But first bring light into your life.

Meditation is an effort to bring light and to bring joy and to bring silence and to bring blissfulness, and out of this beautiful world of meditation it is impossible for you to do anything wrong.

Source type: Book
Autobiography of a Spiritually Incorrect Mystic
Page 124
http://www.virtuescience.com/sayings.html
Contribution #1157

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Source type: Book
Autobiography of a Spiritually Incorrect Mystic
Page 124
http://www.virtuescience.com/sayings.html
Contribution #1157


The Virtues and Vices: A Clearer Look at a Symmetrical Pattern
This table demonstrates how each virtue exists on a balance point. Either too much or too little becomes a vice.
This table is a level of Order above a simple list of virtues and vices. Try not to get caught up in the words but look deeper to the actual universal concepts that they represent.
Cowardice             - Caution           - Bravery            - Recklessness
Weakness             - Gentleness      - Strength          - Roughness
                                - Flexibility       - Steadfastness - Stubbornness
Meanness              - Prudence         - Generosity      - Extravigance
Oversecretiveness - Discretion        - Openness       - Big Mouth
                                                        - Curiosity         - Nosyness
Mistrust                  - Doubt              - Trust               - Gullibility
Inferiority               - Humbleness     - Majesty          - Arrogance
                              - Reverence        - Audacity         - Disrespect
                              -Patience            - Spontaneity    - Rashness
Frivolity                  - Playfulness       - Seriousness
                              - Obedience        - Independence - Disobediance
                              - Giving Leeway  - Authority
Disloyalty               - Impartiality       - Loyalty            - Favoritism
                              - Discernment     - Perserverance -
Intolerance            -                         -  Endurance      - Putting up with Too Much
                              - Spontaneity     - Preparation
Incompleteness     - Simplicity          - Completeness - Over-Complexity
Worry                    - Concern            - Contentment    - Complacency

The Virtues and Vices: A Clearer Look at a Symmetrical Pattern

This table is a level of Order above a simple list of virtues and vices. Try not to get caught up in the words but look deeper to the actual universal concepts that they represent.
Cowardice             - Caution           - Bravery            - Recklessness
Weakness             - Gentleness      - Strength          - Roughness
                                - Flexibility       - Steadfastness - Stubbornness
Meanness              - Prudence         - Generosity      - Extravigance
Oversecretiveness - Discretion        - Openness       - Big Mouth
                                                        - Curiosity         - Nosyness
Mistrust                  - Doubt              - Trust               - Gullibility
Inferiority               - Humbleness     - Majesty          - Arrogance
                              - Reverence        - Audacity         - Disrespect
                              -Patience            - Spontaneity    - Rashness
Frivolity                  - Playfulness       - Seriousness
                              - Obedience        - Independence - Disobediance
                              - Giving Leeway  - Authority
Disloyalty               - Impartiality       - Loyalty            - Favoritism
                              - Discernment     - Perserverance -
Intolerance            -                         -  Endurance      - Putting up with Too Much
                              - Spontaneity     - Preparation
Incompleteness     - Simplicity          - Completeness - Over-Complexity
Worry                    - Concern            - Contentment    - Complacency
Source type: Website
James Barton
http://www.virtuescience.com/balance.html
Viewed on April 30, 2008
Contribution #1152

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Source type: Website
James Barton
http://www.virtuescience.com/balance.html
Viewed on April 30, 2008
Contribution #1152


Virtue and Character - Why Study?
It is a principle of life that the more we study a subject the greater our knowledge and control of it grows. Let us then study Character which is at the root of all the world's problems and their solutions.
Imagine driving a car. If the steering was misaligned and continued to pull you to the left or the right, or otherwise did not respond properly, then it would become a priority to get it fixed.

Your Character is far more valuable and useful to you than a car or other material object. It is natural and logical to direct some of your time, energy and attention towards the contemplation of your Character.

It is a principle of life that the more we study a subject the greater our knowledge and control of it grows. Let us then study Character which is at the root of all the world's problems and their solutions.

All your thoughts, speech and actions (which greatly effect your circumstances) arise from the quality of your personality. Almost all personalities contain flaws and are "lobsided" to some degree. By lobsided I mean that some qualities are over extended whilst others are stunted resulting in vices such as greed, cowardice and dishonesty etc.

Understanding and reclaiming natural Virtue is at the heart of genuine self improvement. From now on, every time that you read an article about self improvement and personal success see it in the light of the Virtues. You will find that many, in effect, are describing various virtues such as bravery, persistance, spontaneity and patience etc. When you appreciate this you will gain a valuable overview of the whole subject of self improvement. A deep curiosity and love for the virtues will awaken. As your love and acceptence increases for the forgotten and repressed aspects of your Character they will re-integrate with you and again become available for your use.

In terms of time and energy it is much more "cost effective" (and more enjoyable) to increase your virtue than to try and force a behavior change in yourself. The increased virtue will naturally beneficially influence a wide range of your behaviors. Some negative habits will disappear by themselves without the need for conscious effort.

Dedicate a notebook to your study of the virtues. Write a list of as many virtues and vices as you can and explore how they are related to each other. You may be surprised to discover a universal pattern in them. Keep a record of the questions you have about the virtues and the insights that you gain from exploring those questions.

What assumptions have you been holding about Character and the Virtues? Maybe some of your assumptions have been holding you back. Do not accept negative, self limiting beliefs from others who may have made absolutely no study of the subject. Instead find out for yourself with gentle persistance and a genuine open minded curiosity. Some claim that there is a limit to character improvement and so then make no effort to improve. If you believe that there is a limit then first reach it and then look again. You may find that the limits, which seemed so solid from a distance, melt away as you approach them.

By focusing your attention on positive qualities you will be raising up your outlook on life and you will find that your Character also raises up to greater levels of harmony. Examine your personality as if for the first time, try and look into deeper layers of yourself. The Light of your attention will illuminate and bring to the surface many hidden treasures from within your nature.

Virtue and Character - Why Study?

Imagine driving a car. If the steering was misaligned and continued to pull you to the left or the right, or otherwise did not respond properly, then it would become a priority to get it fixed.

Your Character is far more valuable and useful to you than a car or other material object. It is natural and logical to direct some of your time, energy and attention towards the contemplation of your Character.

It is a principle of life that the more we study a subject the greater our knowledge and control of it grows. Let us then study Character which is at the root of all the world's problems and their solutions.

All your thoughts, speech and actions (which greatly effect your circumstances) arise from the quality of your personality. Almost all personalities contain flaws and are "lobsided" to some degree. By lobsided I mean that some qualities are over extended whilst others are stunted resulting in vices such as greed, cowardice and dishonesty etc.

Understanding and reclaiming natural Virtue is at the heart of genuine self improvement. From now on, every time that you read an article about self improvement and personal success see it in the light of the Virtues. You will find that many, in effect, are describing various virtues such as bravery, persistance, spontaneity and patience etc. When you appreciate this you will gain a valuable overview of the whole subject of self improvement. A deep curiosity and love for the virtues will awaken. As your love and acceptence increases for the forgotten and repressed aspects of your Character they will re-integrate with you and again become available for your use.

In terms of time and energy it is much more "cost effective" (and more enjoyable) to increase your virtue than to try and force a behavior change in yourself. The increased virtue will naturally beneficially influence a wide range of your behaviors. Some negative habits will disappear by themselves without the need for conscious effort.

Dedicate a notebook to your study of the virtues. Write a list of as many virtues and vices as you can and explore how they are related to each other. You may be surprised to discover a universal pattern in them. Keep a record of the questions you have about the virtues and the insights that you gain from exploring those questions.

What assumptions have you been holding about Character and the Virtues? Maybe some of your assumptions have been holding you back. Do not accept negative, self limiting beliefs from others who may have made absolutely no study of the subject. Instead find out for yourself with gentle persistance and a genuine open minded curiosity. Some claim that there is a limit to character improvement and so then make no effort to improve. If you believe that there is a limit then first reach it and then look again. You may find that the limits, which seemed so solid from a distance, melt away as you approach them.

By focusing your attention on positive qualities you will be raising up your outlook on life and you will find that your Character also raises up to greater levels of harmony. Examine your personality as if for the first time, try and look into deeper layers of yourself. The Light of your attention will illuminate and bring to the surface many hidden treasures from within your nature.
Source type: Website
James Barton
"Virtue and Character - Why Study?"
http://www.virtuescience.com/why-study-virtue.html
Viewed on April 30, 2008
Contribution #1140

Source (click to close)

Source type: Website
James Barton
"Virtue and Character - Why Study?"
http://www.virtuescience.com/why-study-virtue.html
Viewed on April 30, 2008
Contribution #1140


excerpt: Self Acceptance vs. Personal Growth
Why does there seem to be a conflict between self-acceptance and growth anyway? I think the conflict is actually a result of a particular mindset. I’ll refer to it as the linear mindset.
How do you balance self-acceptance vs. the drive to grow and improve yourself? On the one hand, it’s a good idea to accept yourself for who you are . . . faults and all, right? But on the other hand, isn’t it also a good idea to set goals and aim for something even better than what you already experience now?  How do you resolve this conflict?

The linear mindset
The linear mindset says that your life is like a point moving down a line segment.  Your life is a journey through time.  The end points represent your birth and death.  The points behind you are your past.  The points ahead of you are your future.  And your present moment is a little dot on that timeline, slowly inching its way towards your death.


Every point on your life line can also be said to have a certain quality.  You can look at any point on the line and measure your instantaneous state at that point.  On any particular day of your life (past, present, or future), you can pose questions like:  Where do I live?  What’s my job?  What’s my net worth?  Who are my friends?  What’s my relationship status?  How much do I weigh?


Self-acceptance vs. personal growth

Within this paradigm it’s only natural that the conflict between self-acceptance and growth should arise.  Once you start labeling some points of your life as being of “higher” or “lower” quality than others, then you have the means to compare any point to any other.  How does your life today compare with your life five years ago?  Are you richer?  Happier?  Healthier?


Trying to apply a linear mindset to your self-image creates the conflict between self-acceptance and growth.  Instead of merely measuring various aspects of your life and noting how they change over time, you identify with them. I am richer than I was last year. I am more depressed than I used to be. I went from being a telemarketer to being a sales manager . . . .

Beyond the linear mindset

Instead of rooting your sense of self in your position, which is changeable, what would happen if you rooted your sense of self in something permanent and unchangeable? Stop identifying yourself with any form of positional status, and pick something invulnerable instead… like a pure concept that nothing in this world can touch. Examples include unconditional love, service to humanity, faith in a higher power, compassion, nonviolence, and so on.

By rooting yourself in the permanent, your position detaches from your identity. This makes it possible to unconditionally accept yourself as you are while still courageously playing the positional growth game, regardless of the outcome. Self-acceptance and growth are no longer in conflict because now they don’t apply to the same thing. You’ve separated your identity (self-acceptance) from your position (growth).

You can see this full essay at http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/04/self-acceptance-vs-personal-growth/.

excerpt: Self Acceptance vs. Personal Growth

How do you balance self-acceptance vs. the drive to grow and improve yourself? On the one hand, it’s a good idea to accept yourself for who you are . . . faults and all, right? But on the other hand, isn’t it also a good idea to set goals and aim for something even better than what you already experience now?  How do you resolve this conflict?

The linear mindset
The linear mindset says that your life is like a point moving down a line segment.  Your life is a journey through time.  The end points represent your birth and death.  The points behind you are your past.  The points ahead of you are your future.  And your present moment is a little dot on that timeline, slowly inching its way towards your death.


Every point on your life line can also be said to have a certain quality.  You can look at any point on the line and measure your instantaneous state at that point.  On any particular day of your life (past, present, or future), you can pose questions like:  Where do I live?  What’s my job?  What’s my net worth?  Who are my friends?  What’s my relationship status?  How much do I weigh?


Self-acceptance vs. personal growth

Within this paradigm it’s only natural that the conflict between self-acceptance and growth should arise.  Once you start labeling some points of your life as being of “higher” or “lower” quality than others, then you have the means to compare any point to any other.  How does your life today compare with your life five years ago?  Are you richer?  Happier?  Healthier?


Trying to apply a linear mindset to your self-image creates the conflict between self-acceptance and growth.  Instead of merely measuring various aspects of your life and noting how they change over time, you identify with them. I am richer than I was last year. I am more depressed than I used to be. I went from being a telemarketer to being a sales manager . . . .

Beyond the linear mindset

Instead of rooting your sense of self in your position, which is changeable, what would happen if you rooted your sense of self in something permanent and unchangeable? Stop identifying yourself with any form of positional status, and pick something invulnerable instead… like a pure concept that nothing in this world can touch. Examples include unconditional love, service to humanity, faith in a higher power, compassion, nonviolence, and so on.

By rooting yourself in the permanent, your position detaches from your identity. This makes it possible to unconditionally accept yourself as you are while still courageously playing the positional growth game, regardless of the outcome. Self-acceptance and growth are no longer in conflict because now they don’t apply to the same thing. You’ve separated your identity (self-acceptance) from your position (growth).

You can see this full essay at http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/04/self-acceptance-vs-personal-growth/.
Source type: Website
Steve Pavlina
"Self Acceptance vs. Personal Growth "
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/04/self-acceptance-vs-personal-growth/
Viewed on May 10, 2008
Contribution #791

Source (click to close)

Source type: Website
Steve Pavlina
"Self Acceptance vs. Personal Growth "
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/04/self-acceptance-vs-personal-growth/
Viewed on May 10, 2008
Contribution #791