RSS feed

Forbearance

previous next

Also: Restraint, Self-Control

Forbearance or self-control is the ability to exercise restraint, to stay in balance. It is disciplining yourself to be measured and temperate in your response to trying circumstances. It is being patent and even keeled while enduring hardships. It is having the ability to constrain your own worst impulses and allowing thoughtful, wiser aspects of yourself to govern what you say and do.


Just because we can do something doesn't mean we should. Forbearance protects us against doing harm on impulse in the throes of anger or fear. Since so much of virtue is about finding a balance point between two kinds of excess, forbearance helps to keep us close to the center of our better selves.

Forbearance


Sort by: Newest First | Rating
O FRIEND! In the garden of thy heart plant naught but the rose of love, and from the nightingale of affection and desire loosen not thy hold. Treasure the companionship of the righteous and eschew all fellowship with the ungodly.

Source (click to close)

Source type: Sacred Text
Baha'i Writings
The Hidden Words of Baha'u'llah pg 52
Published by US Baha'i Publishing Trust
Published in 1985
http://reference.bahai.org/en/t/b/HW/hw-76.html
Contribution #4287


"...religion must be the cause of unity, harmony and agreement among mankind. If it be the cause of discourd and hostility, if it leads to separation and creates conflict, the absence of religion would be preferable in the world...

Source (click to close)

Source type: Sacred Text
Baha'i World Faith pgs 245-248
http://reference.bahai.org
Contribution #4278


Each one of us here today will, at one time in our lives look upon a loved one who is in need and ask the same question. "We are willing to help, Lord, but what, if anything, is needed?" It is true we can seldom help those closest to us. Either we don't know what part of ourselves to give or more often than not, the part we have to give is not wanted. And so it is those we live with and should know who elude us, but we can still love them. We can love completely, without complete understanding.

Source (click to close)

Source type: Book
A River Runs Through It
Published in 1976
http://
Contribution #4067


The serenity of mind, gentleness, silence, self-restraint, and the purity of mind are called the austerity of thought.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #4036


Just because something is true doesn't mean you have to say it.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #3987


The good neighbor looks beyond the external accidents and discerns those inner qualities that make all men human and, therefore, brothers. Martin Luther King Jr., 'Strength to Love,' 1963

Source (click to close)

Source type: Book
The Strength Of Love
http://
Contribution #3742


Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love.

Source (click to close)

Source type: Book
The Strength Of Love
http://
Contribution #3740


An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind

Source (click to close)

Contribution #3666


Forgiveness demands not Justice and Justice demands not Forgiveness.

Source (click to close)

Contribution #3624


I have learned through bitter experience the one supreme lesson: to conserve my anger, and as heat conserved is transmitted into energy, even so our anger controlled can be transmitted into a power...

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #3349


No wind, no waves.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #3337


We are masters of the unsaid words, but slaves of those we let slip out.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #3311


If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man's life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #3292


When we think carefully, we see that the brief elation we experience when appeasing sensual impulses may not be very different from what the drug addict feels when indulging his or her habit. Temporary relief is soon followed by a craving for more. And in just the same way that taking drugs in the end only causes trouble, so, too, does much of what we undertake to fulfill our immediate sensory desires.

Source (click to close)

Source type: Book
Ethics for the New Millenium
Page 52
Published by Riverhead Books , New York , 2001
http://
Contribution #2799


Anybody can become angry, that is easy; but to be angry with the right person, and to the right degree, and at the right time, and for the right purpose, and in the right way, that is not within everybody's power, that is not easy.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #2782


Hold no man responsible for what he says in his grief.

Source (click to close)

Source type: Sacred Text
http://
Contribution #2615


Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #2436


Forbearance is the greatest virtue. Cover the blemishes, faults and weaknesses of others. Excuse their feelings, buiry their weakness in silence . . . and forgive.

Source (click to close)

Virtues Reflection Cards
http://www.virtuesproject.com
Contribution #2196


Anyone who has the power to make you believe absurdities has the power to make you commit injustices.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #2081


Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #2012


How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #1966


The best way of avenging yourself is not to become like the wrongdoer.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #1965


Never answer a critic, unless he's right.

Source (click to close)

Source type: Website
Bernard Baruch
http://www.ealasaid.com/quotes/a-c.html
Viewed on May 14, 2008
Contribution #1278


The highest proof of virtue is to possess boundless power without abusing it.

Source (click to close)

Source type: Book
Life and Writings of Addison
by Lucy Aikin
Published in 1943
http://
Contribution #1165


I think the first virtue is to restrain the tongue; he approaches nearest to gods who knows how to be silent, even though he is in the right.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #1161


Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell. 

Source (click to close)

Source type: Website
Unknown
http://www.quotegarden.com/self-control.html
Viewed on April 22, 2008
Contribution #1003


Self-respect is the root of discipline:  The sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself. 

Source (click to close)

Source type: Website
Abraham Joshua Heschel
http://www.quotegarden.com/self-control.html
Viewed on April 22, 2008
Contribution #1000


Pity and forbearance should characterize all acts of justice.

Source (click to close)

Source type: Website
Benjamin Franklin
http://www.giga-usa.com/quotes/authors/benjamin_franklin_a001.htm
Viewed on April 15, 2008
Contribution #822


That one I love who is incapable of ill will, and returns love for hatred. Living beyond the reach of I and mind, and of pain and pleasure, full of mercy, contented, self-controlled, with all his heart and all his mind given to Me -- with such a one I am in love.

Source (click to close)

Source type: Sacred Text
Bhagavad Gita
http://
Contribution #595


Prudent, cautious self-control, is wisdom's root.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #594


The basic difference between being assertive and being aggressive is how our words and behavior affect the rights and well being of others.

Source (click to close)

No source entered for Contribution #419